This site was 1 piece of the puzzle that helped me through so many as my divorce day came to and end 1-23-03. It went real fast, about 10 mins. We were very civil(that is one thing I was worried about....How I was gonna react) I thought for sure she would show up with support(family, her lover)
She came alone and we small talked and even joked. She even took the time afterwards to go register the title of the house to my name only. She gave me a lot and took hardly anything. I will always figure it was because of guilt and shame. She did take 1 thing very important to me though...my heart and our noral history together.
Since she left in Sept 2001 I had plenty of time to be angry, sad,depressed (to the point of needing the hospital) It didnt hit me until last fall that I and I alone could control my happiness and any other feelings that arose.
I'm not saying I am totally over this. Now I am reading a book called "Forgiving the Unforgivable". Hopefully this will help take the bitterness away.
As we were about to go in our seperate directions at the courthouse she grabbed me and hugged me tightly, kissed me softly, and started to cry. She thanked me and I apologized for not being a better husband.
I can say one thing about this. I was happy to see the wife I fellin love with (The look on her face and the obvious feeling in her shamed heart)one more time before we departed.
I gave her a letter with 1 more of my poems entitled "The Last Nail" and a cassette tape of various music to remember me by.
About 5 hours later she called my house crying after she read the letter. She said she is so sorry for giving me so much pain and she hopes I have a good life.
Its so ironic but it is over. I started to realize at least now there is no more agreements or disagreements. No more wondering....no more questions.
I want to thank all that responded to me during this hard part of my life that all of us had to suffer through.
It can get better after the pain subsides. Its up to you. Tough Love was the post I started reading when I first came to this site and the directions I went from there truly helped my start to healing.
Thanks again...Nitehawk

I wish you the best of luck in your life.

I am the FWW. I had an EA that turned into a one time PA. I have been trying for almost a year to show my H how remorseful I am and how willing I am to save our M.

He truly thinks he wants a D now. He says he doesn't know if he's in love with me anymore.
I will be traveling your road soon, I'm afraid.

Good Luck to you.

Hi Nitehawk,

Your post was very moving.

Acceptance is one of the phases that we go through during the process of divorce... and you appear to be handling it well.

I wish you the best of luck my friend, as you begin your new journey.

Stay Strong!

Wallace

Nitehawk,

Here's a cyberhug hug for you ((((((((((((((((nitehawk))))))))))))))))))))
You sound like like you have grown from this whole horrible ordeal and will now use this to move on with grace and acceptance.

Keep in touch & let us know how you are doing!

God Bless,

D,

{{{{nitehawk}}}}
I'm dreading the day you just went through. But hearing how it went for you gives me some hope. We'll survive, and hopefully, soon, we'll begin to flourish again.

My STBXH is drunk,high, and as far as I know, hasn't worked in two years while I support him by running our business alone. I don't expect any remorse from him. As far as he's concerned, I'm to blame for everything.

{{{nighthawk}}}

I am hoping mine is finally over on the 29th, but hard to say with stbx's past history. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

This has been a long, hard time of it, am glad you finally get some closure. Take care of yourself!

Lori