It's sad that i didn't find this website till last week, my wife and i have been married 16 years, 2 girls, 9 and 5, my wife and i both work, for the past 9 years i have had the duties of staying home with the kids and raising them,while my wife worked and i worked parttime,
my wife has been unhappy with our marriage for a long time, we never had counciling,till last summer, 3 sessions, and my councilor said that my wife had that burned out look, that it did't sound like she wanted to be married to you.
we went to 3 sessions, never got to the point of guiding us to a direction of working on our marriage, always was well it doesn't seem like she wants to be married, and it doesn't look good.
week and half ago, i made appointment with another councilor, hoping that this councilor might say something to point us in direction of healing our marriage.......instead..........
councilor listened to us for 15 minutes...........
told my wife that it sounds like she has been unhappy for a long time.........
and then insulted her and told her that she had no backbone and was spineless, and that its simple you just need to find an attorney and file for divorce......she said we needed counciling and years ago......that it was too late now.....
when we left my wife said she couldn't believe that she had been told that she had no backbone and was spineless.......she said we just need to find another councilor.......

then a week ago i found marriage builders........
and it seemed wonderful........
i read the concepts to my wife...........
and she really opened up..........
said that the seminar in sf would be great.........
maybe we could go.........
that was wednesday...........
thursday night i went to work
came home at 7 am, wife gone to work early
wife's mom home with my kids
so i took my kids to school
went to pick them up when i woke up at 3 pm
to get kids, wife had already picked them up
and i haven't heard or seen from my kids of wife since.......
my brother flew in from oklahoma...i am in oregon..on no notice to help me out
spent night with him at motel
came home and my locks to my house had been changed, fortunatly the rear door had been left open......
my brother met with my wife last night
is going to try and meet with her today
to get r/o modified, so that i can have access to my kids and to our house.....
i have not been served r/o yet
so i have not violated anything.......
just my trust has been violated
was my wife afraid that she saw a way to heal the marriage when i showed her marriage builders....
everyone on her side of family is saying that you guys haven't gotten along for 17 years.....
that their is too much water under the bridge.....
no one is pointing her towards counciling....
just seperation.......
remember we have never had counciling that would lead us together only counciling that would tear us apart........
we haven't had anytime alone for 9 years.......
and even longer than that.......she was working or i was working never had same days off......
now for the 1st time in 6 years i have weekends off.......i have not family..............

somebody please help us
robert

It seems like a part of this story is missing here. You'll get advice if you put yourself out there.
Right now, she can only get a Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) for about two weeks time, if it is unjustified, it will not be allowed.
Get an atty now to protect your rights, and to get advice on how and when to see your children.

Y

<small>[ March 20, 2003, 01:37 PM: Message edited by: broken heart and arm ]</small>

Robert,

I too think there is more to the story than you are writing about.

Perhaps I'm being unnecessarily suspicious because of my own situation but I can't help but wonder...

Was there alot of anger? Any abuse?

ANNA