... I've been on the recovery board for a while, but have now moved here after seeing a lawyer last week. I read the thread below and I feel like my situation is a lot like Desiree's (I hope I got the name right).
About 2 and 1/2 years ago, I caught my H in several lies. It's continued on through 2 rounds of marriage counseling and him seeing me cry too many tears to count. H has admitted to an EA, but that's it. Just last week in a counseling session with our pastor, H lied to the pastor.
I do not want a divorce. I want God's will for my life and I do believe in the power of prayer. But somewhere my H's will comes into play. We have 2 young children who have sufferred greatly from the chaos.
The final straw for me was talking to H's ex-fiancee whom he was with 5 years. He has continued to try to contact her all this time. And she knew exactly what he was putting me through - the cheating, the lying, the tears, saying he was saved, saying he was sorry, etc.
It dawned on me that he had done this to her and to me -- 10 years... 1/3 of his life.

Do I want a divorce? No. Do I want to raise children alone? No. Do I want those long nights of lonliness? No. But then I have to ask myself, Do I want to raise a son and daughter in a home of deception? No. Do I want the pain of living with a man who can pray with me one minute and lie to me the next? No. And can I bear to find out about his love/lust/need for another woman? Absolutely not.

Here are my questions: 1) How do I deal with my sister who criticizes me as stepping out of God's plan?

2) The papers aren't ready yet, but I had told the lawyer to file with a 6 month reconciliation period. I'm not really sure why, but I wondered how you all felt about the reconciliation period?