Many know my story. I was physically abused by my ex and a divorce was the end result.

He moved in with a woman about a week after the divorce. She just called upset, crying and very sick, I think she said her blood glucose level is at 30. I don't know what levels are normal. She's called the ambulance and they are on there way.

Ex's GF tried to call ex all day to ask him if he could take her to the hospital. She said last week they broke up.

Anyway, I don't understand why she didn't just call an ambulance to begin with. She told me she has been seeing the "other side" of my ex lately. He's got that Jeckyl/Hyde character going on. Anyway, she said she called the police to tell the police to go to ex's place and tell him she is on the way to the hospital. My ex called her and screamed obsenities at her, calling her names, saying how dare you send the police and scare the children. She said he sounded like he really lost it, and she has seen a mean side to him but this was real bad.

I know what she is talking about. When he gets like that, he's crazy.

I am still not sure why she called me. She said something about, "Since you are the mother, I wanted you to assure the kids tomorrow that I only had the police go to their dad's house to tell him."

I am so concerned about many things. Him losing it totally and coming after me. Him losing it and losing his job and thus no child support....a father that is nuts...ohmygosh, What if he loses it with the kids some day?

I'm rambling on, but I'm just so freaked out by all this.

ANNA

Anna. how much of the time are the kids with him?

Do you have an answering machine or other device you could use to tape and save your messages or conversations with him. My old machine uses a microcassette and I have a stash of x's bizarre rants .

That is scary. I'm sorry it happened. You definitely need to talk to the children and see what his behavior is like toward them.

I know I did call police once on x - after the fact. He had thrown his keys at one of the children and hit him with them. So, there is an incident report on him. I hated to do it but found that I needed to start drawing the line. I'm not going to tolerate his anger anymore.

Is it that time for you.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by cinderella:
<strong>

Is it that time for you.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Cinderella,

I read your thread when you did that. I was very impressed you called the police. I bet he was stunned and didn't expect that from you.

It's best to call it to everyone's attention before it goes too far. Your ex will probably never do that again. He knows you mean business.

Thanks for the good advice. Yes, I definitely need to draw the line and call the police if he touches the kids.

I am concerned the first time he touches them it won't be small though. He goes into rages and loses all control. What if his first time really hurts the kids?

I am going to get a small tape recorder. Typically he calls me on my cel while driving home. I may need that back up. Although, usually I have learned to hang up on first verbally abusive word, I'll just go ahead and stay on a few times to get it on record.

The G/F called me around 1:30 in the morning again. I had told her to call me the next day to let me know she is okay, so I can pass that on to the kids. I know they grew to like her and would want to know. She said the ambulance came, gave her meds, and tried to get her to go to the hospital but she refused. She said she doesn't want a lot of hospital stays because she is going through a divorce and it's not final.

Again, I don't understand that statement. She was wanting ex to take her there...but then again I do also know that low sugar can leave you not thinking correctly.

Also, how can my ex be so cruel to someone who is so sick. He knows how serious of a diabetic she is and yet he screams and her and verbally abuses her because she needs his help.

Well, I can't wait to get my kids home safely tonight!!!!!

Thanks again!

ANNA

P.S.

His G/F told me last night, "He told me all the abuse he did to you while he was drinking, and you deserve a medal for that." I responded back, "Yep, a medal of stupidity."

<small>[ February 02, 2003, 10:07 AM: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</small>

anna,
I relate to your story because of the verbal abuse. Our "kids" at the time he left were his son and a teenaged niece and nephew. I found out later he was giving them drugs. After moving back home briefly to try to reconcile, he threw me out of the house one day and that night "snuck" OW in the sliding glass door to the bedroom. The kids knew. The next day he threw a "kegger" party for his then 19 year old son (he was 48!?) and invited then 21 year old MOW.

The kids got wind of it and 17 y.o. niece begged him please not to let her come over. H threw niece up against the wall, screaming obscenities and hurtful remarks at both kids, and threatened to punch niece until his son intervened. H then threw the niece and nephew out saying, "I love MOW and if you don't love her, then get the f*** out!" Niece, nephew, and I lived in a motel until I got a restraining order and got him and OW ejected from the house.

The emotional damage was the worst, especially to niece who'd been especially close to H because she'd never felt close to her own dad (both her parents were active addict/alcoholics when they came to live with us. I thought H was sober, but I think now he was probably already drinking and using again by then).

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">His G/F told me last night, "He told me all the abuse he did to you while he was drinking, and you deserve a medal for that." I responded back, "Yep, a medal of stupidity."</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Is there an extra one for me?!

Anna, I'll be thinking of you today....it's a good idea to talk this out with the kids.

I think abusers hate it when THEY aren't in control. My ex hated it that I was diabetic, as if somehow I wanted to be that way to get attention! He would be furious with me if I asked him to watch the kids so I could take care of myself.....or stop and get something to eat because my blood sugar was low....I learned to hide it from him. Oh, and every time I got upset, he'd say "oh you're just irrational because you're diabetic".

I'm glad the girl is ok....normal is 70 to 140, 30 is way too low! She was probably not thinking clearly, just desperate to find someone who could help her.

LetSTry,

At least our eyes are open now and we will hopefully learn from this. If anyone ever touches me again, I call the police immediately, no matter who it is or what threats are made.

Annavon,

Your ex is one of those that also needs to be put in a mental institution.

Well, the kids are back home, the only thing said was by older son, he stated "Dad said GF is probably faking it to get attention, he says GF is high maintenance..." <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

If she was faking she is good!

On the flip side, I talked to ex and said, "GF told me you guys broke up last week and you are now living at his uncles place. I then said, "I'm suppose to be notified when you move." He said, "HUH? I didn't move out. Someone is lying here." I'm said, "Hey you guys are putting me in the middle of this, and yes someone is lying, you or her, I don't care about your relationship but I care about knowing where the children are living." He said, "When GF and he fight he doesn't want the kids around it, so he takes them to his uncles place."

I do know they have been there off and on the last couple of months.

Anyway, he told me he thinks she was hallucinating from her blood sugar being so low and that's why she said it...So which is it, she was really sick and that is why she said they were split up when they weren't...or she is faking and not sick, but just lied....I know it can't be both.

Well, at least I know, he's either at her house or his uncles place when he has them.

c'ya'll,

ANNA

P.S.

He also said the kids didn't hear him go off on her...

<small>[ February 02, 2003, 08:23 PM: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</small>

Anna2000:
P.S.

He also said the kids didn't hear him go off on her...[/QB][/QUOTE]

Balloney. The kids were probably pretending not to hear. Hiding, as it were. If they don't say anything or ask any questions, that doesn't mean they didn't hear him go off on her.

In our households growing up (moved in with different relatives and from town to town) when the arguments were going on, when the derogatory comments were made about the absent parent and we were supposed to be "asleep", when other ugly things were said and done that were disgusting and horrid, we knew we were supposed to be "unaware."

It was bad enough hearing and being aware of what was going on. Worse would have been to go out and get in the middle of it, confront our parents/relatives. We knew they would turn on us if we did that.

They think the kids don't know what's going on. The kids are more aware of the things the adults think are discrete and hidden than the adults know. The kids talk to each other about it, but play dumb around the adults.

He's sick and deluded. Get the kids home with you as soon and as often as possible. Give them stability and normalcy.