Lupo.....I think it is a great idea using faithfulwife's post. It really said a lot to me as I read it.

Extra prayers are coming your way. Valentines was especially hard on me too. I always tried to do something special for her(not just dinner) and I really missed having her hold me. When I went to bed I took the pillow and snuggled it real tight and just thought of it being her then I turned over and put it at my back and put my hand under my pillow like I use to do and imagined her snuggling in behind me and me holding her hand under my pillow like we use too. I guess it was hard on all of us.

BOY DO I MISS MY WIFE

Love in Christ
cajunky

cj, thanks so much for that, it was inspiring and obviously heartfelt. I'm so sorry about your current situation.

You guys are all so wonderful. Every time I think that I need to stay away because it's just feeding into my obsession, I see something I really need to see, and feel the love from all of you.

Like WGTT, I too pray for my H's sobriety. I also pray for the OW's sobriety. She is the mother of a 5 year old girl who is living with my STBXH and the MOW, in the midst of depravity. All I can do is pray for them.

Hi All,

Just wanted to check in and let you know, I'm praying.

Also, regarding Rejoice Ministries. They have a website with Bible Studies which are truly awesome. They are at http://rejoicenet.net, they are truly a blessing for the stander. You will need to download Real Player if you don't already have it.

God Bless,
relady

Just jumping in for some prayer action.

Pray for my WW. That her confusion will leave and peace return and our love is restored.

Just wanted to let ya'll know everyone of you is in my prayers.

Also a praise. My parents are celebrating their 49th wedding anniversary today. They have survived military separations, the Vietnam War and they still hold hands when they walk together. Is that cool or what? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

S&C

Be encouraged all of you! God is at work! He is moving! He is going to bring the prodigals home! I am so blessed! Keep trusting, keep believing, NEVER, NEVER give up!
Thankyou so much for your prayers! It is hard to wait on the Lord for the restoration of our marriages, but.... with our faithfulness to Him, He will give us what we need in His time...
I have seen my husband only twice in 7 years. All through that time, the Lord has kept showing me promises, in His Word, through dreams, in my heart just knowing that He is working on my H's heart. Most people will tell me to move on, that I should not deprive myself of another relationship, asking things like "what if you meet mr. right?" Well, my answer is "I already have" of course they don't "get it", but that's ok. The Lord is who I must believe and not listen to people of little or no faith!
I have doubted many times in the past as well, but God in His goodness and Mercy has always reassured me that I am doing exactly what He wants.
That now brings me to the weekend. I was at a Covenant Keepers retreat in White Rock BC, my H works about an hour away from there in Abbottsford. I flew in, over the mountains and valleys, I witnessed the tide coming and going, it rained off and on...
It was an awesome weekend, I sang on the worship team, one song we sang was called "It's time"
We sang many worship songs, and I also sang two solos on SAt night, but I didn't feel the Holy Spirit come upon me when I asked, (I usually feel His annointing) I knew God was there, but was unsure why I didn't feel that.
Every other person I met came from 'Abbottsford' I can't tell you how many times I heard that name! I was trying to find a sign from the Lord whether or not to contact my husband. I spent all weekend waiting for this sign and Sat. night, I was on my knees before the Lord asking Him to please give me a clear direction, and that I so desperately wanted to see my H. I really wanted to hear from Him,I prayed it again before I went to bed.
The next morning worship started at 9:30 am, By the end of the first song, I felt the Holy Spirit fill me, and I was happy, thanking Him as I sang.
The speaker began to speak, and God spoke directly at my heart. The message was about taking a step knowing that God is before me, and that He will be my rear guard! I knew that the LOrd was leading me to see my H the next day, to take that 'step', but I had to be 100% sure not 90%. After the speaker spoke, I went back on stage to sing and we sang the same song we had sung all weekend, "It's time" Well, it was like I heard it for the first time....
The words are...
I can hear the calling , I can hear the sound of rain, over the mountain, and over the valleys, I hear the calling its time! there is also a line in the verse about the turning tide~!
Well I could not sing or play, as they continued to repeat that song, I got off the stage and wept! I'ts time! Wow that was soo cool but it also was soooo scary! I haven't seen him in three 1/2 years,
So now that I knew I had the clear direction, I phoned him the next morning, he was happy to hear from me, and we ended up getting together for lunch for 2 hours! The Lord allowed me to see his heart, that there are changes. I ended up telling him about my stand, and that I have been and will be faithful to him til death do we part! Whether or not he decided to get a divorce, I will stand! The Lord has answered prayer, because I saw a softening of his heart. WHen I saw him last, he was cocky, and talked only of himself, this time, he was kind, and asked me about me! I have been praying ot the Lord to put it on his heart to quit smoking, guess what? This April it will be 1 year since he quit! Praise the Lord~!!! When I got there, I got a big hug, boy that felt good, and when I left, he hugged me again and even gave me a kiss <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> right on the lips! And before you know it, the words "I love you" escaped my lips, and I left! Wow that was God! I am so grateful that I was able to witness the change the Lord promised would happen.

The reason I share this is that if God has given you a promise to restore your marriage, He will!
Trust Him, He knows when and where. Be blessed! I am!
Thankyou Cajunky for your intercessory prayers and of course all of you who did pray for me., God is good and He listens to His sheep,
Love in Christ! SW

WOW, Stillwaiting,

This was just such an uplifting story. I'm so sure you are here with us now to uplift many of US!! I hope we give as much back to you.

Only once did I "follow the leading of the Lord" and tell my H that God did not want us Div'd. His answer was he "didn't care, and was doing it anyway."

I pray often that God will bring those words back into his brain, and touch his heart with HIS will.

I also would like to share that "something" is happening. Folks, it's not necessarily good. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> There's this "guy" at church. He just started coming to my church a couple of months ago. He's about my age (believe me, in THIS small town, and THIS small church, at MY AGE - that ain't no small task!!) Anyway, it's just so intriguing in its own way...........he just appeared at our church about 2 months ago. Started sitting NEAR MY SEAT <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> so we make eye contact about every time. Never talked to each other much (I am trying to worship, commune w/God, NOT be distracted by him).

SO tonight, we finally had a conversation (first real one, besides "Hello, how are you today? Have a nice day."). He acts all like "I've hurt my arm lifting weights, thinking I'm 21 again....."

Ladies, you know what I mean......doing the "poor me, please mother me" routine on me........

Well, the bottom line is: I KNOW God wants me to wait for/pray for my H. I KNOW God is going to bring him home. I have promises.

THIS IS JUST SO HARD. I AM SO LONELY.

Folks, I live alone. We had only lived in this small town a couple of years when he left (sounds like a long time, but people in small towns don't warm up to "strangers" very quickly). It;s a VERY small town. I work here, too, so anything I do will be known by EVERYONE. I don't know a lot of folks around here, and we only had one other couple we were friends with. Obviously, I don't socialize with them much (since they are a couple, and I no longer am). Plus they have since had a baby (late in life, yes, but still we're not on the same page, and at different age levels, interests, too)

The point? There's not really many people (nearby) that I can call, hang with, etc. I am ALONE most of the time. I have no children, and NO close friends who live near. If I am off work, I could go DAYS without talking to another human being. I KNOW God has a hand in this, but I am growing LONELY at this now. It's been almost 2 years like this, and I am just plain lonely.

It feels liking whining, and I'm sorry for that, especially when I think of what Stillwaiting has been through. I hope I'm not bugging everyone, but I am just feeling so weak lately (tonight especially after this "deal" with this guy at church.) I DO NOT want to break my vows.

Please pray God will strengthen me, and soften my H's heart soon. Pastor talked about how this could be "beginning of the end" since this whole Middle East conflict is really just still Isreal/Ishmael, could lead to Armageddon - it just made me realize there's probably NOT a lot of time left, and I DO want my H to return to the Lord while there is still time.

P.s> Stillwaiting, I LOVE that song, "It is Time" and we sang it in church last week, too!! I truly believe God is preparing us for the END - SOON.

God Bless all.

relady.....I have looked at that site but haven't done any of it yet. It looked real cool. I will do some in the next couple days.

d_rose......we all will pray for your wife. You can join us every Weds. if you wouold like.

Steadfast....that is so cool. I want to be able to say that about my marriage one day.

Stillwaiting......All I can say is WOW!!!!!! GOD IS SO GOOD. HE REALLY CAN DO ANYTHING. You don't even begin to know how excited I am for you. How did you leave it with him? Is he going to call you?
I am learning from you to wait and let God do the work. It is hard though but you are a good teacher..... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I will have to admit that since all you guy/gals told me to wait and don't push it has been the hardest thing to do. I want to call her all the time and just talk and ask about her day but at the same time I have had a peace about it because I now know God is doing the work. It still kills me to see him over at her house and see him there in the mornings but I know God is working behind the scenes and will restore my marriage.

Like I said before God is using me in so many areas right now it is awesome. I do have somewhat of a praise to tell you about. The head of the singles department and myself are doing a "Leadership Workshop/Teambuilding" hour for all the teachers and the key leaders in the 4 singles classes. We have a big church so this is big. When he introduced me tonite he called me "His right hand man in the singles dept". I am so involved in helping him build the dept. and launch a new singles nite service that I never knew God would use me like this. We had a big meeting with some key people that are helping with this new service today and he told them " Shane is the new unpaid minister in the singles dept". I really am on cloud nine about how God is using me, now that I have my life together again. I know God is going to bless me with bringing my family back together again.

Lupo......I am praying for you. The loneliness is bad when you want someone in particular so bad. I know how you feel but not to your extent. You think about your spouse and want them so bad that you can literally feel the touch of their skin and the warmth of their body touching yours.Keep up the fight as long as God is telling you too.

KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK GUY/GALS. IT IS EVIDENT THAT OUR PRAYERS ARE CHANGING LIVES AND SOFTENING HEARTS. JUST REMEMBER THAT NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD.

I can not tell you how crushed my spirit is.
I came to the divorce board because i am really wanting one. Or do I???
My WH has broken something in me. So many lies.
He has finally come clean and wants to re-build. I just want to make him go away.
We have two little girls.
I don't want this. I am so afraid.
help me.pray for me.
tra

Thankyou all for your encouraging words, you are a blessing to me, and I am so glad to know that my testimony can and will help others in their walk with the Lord

Hey Lupo, I'm sorry you feel so lonely, I know how hard that can be. Is there anyway you can get involved in something at least once a week after work, a bible study or prayer meeting, start your own if you can...
I also live in a small town, but I am so blessed that I work with children, they have kept me so busy these past years, that loneliness only hits on holidays, and because I know that I will be lonely, I usually arrange to go somewhere or be with people.
If you really believe that God wants you to stand for your marriage, then please hang in there....
I know its hard, but the rewards will be worth it!
Don't forget the Lords' promises, He is faithful, and true, no matter what your H may say in retaliation, know that the devil is using his mouth to put your faith down, and in many other ways too, like the loneliness!
No one said this stand would be easy, but you need to saturate yourself with God's Word! If you allow God to take that loneliness, He will fill it with so much more than you can imagine!

As far as this guy, please be careful, the devil knows you are lonely, and it won't be long before you find that out if you give in.

I had a temptation come my way about 4 years ago, I had met a fellow at new years at the church, and he is a Godly man, I found myself attracted to him, and I'm sure he was as well, I found myself flirting with him, and it rather shocked me. Well the next day, I shared this with a friend, and she said, "what would that do to your witness?" When I realized the impact my giving up would have on those many people I've shared with, it woke me up! Well I realized that the devil had succeeded at tempting me, but I needed to resist the temptation. I saw him almost a year after that, and knew that this was not something from the Lord. There were times that I was singing, and I knew he was supposed to come to the concert, so I prayed Lord please don't allow him to come if this is not of you, and things would always end up that he couldn't come afterall! One day in church when I was singing, I gave my testimony about my stand, and the same gentleman was in the congregation, so he knew exactly where I was coming from. After that, I never felt an attraction for him again. In fact he now has started coming to my church and has a very nice girlfriend! If you truly want to do the right thing, tell this fellow about your stand. If he is a man of God he will respect that, and not push more than friendship, if this is something of God, then in His time, what ever will be will be!
I hope and pray that you will find a group of friends to get together with often.

Cajunky, thankyou for your kind words! I didn't leave with him saying he would contact me, I just know in my heart that I will probably contact him again when I go out there next. I did tell him to call me if he comes to town, but I won't expect that, he usually doesn't call me. I will leave it in the Lord's hands.
I actually told him that I would be out again next year, and he said "oh well give us a call, and come over to the house..." I said I didn't think I could handle that. I think the Lord is speaking to me about his GF. I have not met her, but I have a feeling that I might sooner than I think. A few of the dreams I had recently involved her, and that we both in 2 different dreams felt we could be friends under different circumstances. I know that I need to pray for her as well, and as I was reading in some of the books that I picked up at the retreat, so far I've read two testimonies where the Lord has led the BW to pray for and love the OW. wow, it definately has to come from Him! I guess I'll keep you updated on that one as the Lord takes me on this journey.

I'm glad that you are holding off of calling your wife so often. God will give you the strength. Believe me , she will one day notice the distance, will be wondering and probably start finding excuses to call you! I can see it now!
Continue to trust in the Lord, and to wait on Him!
I am so excited to see what the Lord is doing in the lives of his children!

To all other posters, please hang in there, trust the Lord knows what He is doing, draw close to Him, that is His ultimate goal for us! He will come through, He is true to His promises, and if you are one who has not received a promise from Him, seek His Word, ask Him, He will answer in His time~!
God Bless you all, SW

I know I don't post to this thread as often as some of you, but I do want everyone to know that this is the most important one on this forum (JMHO). You all provide me with more inspiration than you can possibly imagine. Caj, Lupo, Still, Faithful Wife, relady, LetSTry, WGTT and the others; your posts and prayers are right on target. Not many people realize the impact each or you have on their lives. I know I sure do.

I just thought it was important to tell you this as I was doing my daily reading this morning (which was Psalm 23). Thanks WGTT and Faithful... As I read that scripture this morning, I looked back at the last 15 months since d-day and the last 6 months I've been coming here, and realized just how much of the Psalm is true.

Thank you all for being so faithful.

Lupo.. God will give you strength and discernment.

Traceys.... Perfect love casts out all fear. If you fear leaving, don't. God has plans for you. How's your relationship with God? Are you ready for Him to reveal to you His plans?

Love in Christ.

S&C

Monika,

Thanks for showing me what has happened, that is simply amazing, God is simply amazing. Doesn't it feel so good to know that you have obeyed the Lord and seen the reward of that obedience. I too will continue to pray.

God bless you all in your stands,
knight

<small>[ February 21, 2003, 06:25 AM: Message edited by: knight?mare ]</small>

S&C

About your parents ...
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> and they still hold hands when they walk together. Is that cool or what?
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That is so beautiful! Today I can be happy for them, but for a while I was angry and jealous of those who had what I didn't. How is it that some people have a wonderfull relationship their whole lives?

D.