My wife of 4yrs, been together 7, has decided on a separation. I am against it for the fact I love her. We have a 4 yr old. She says she needs time to gather her thoughts. Fine, but, we got into some debt with the house and I let her do all the bills. she goofed on the refinancing of the house and my 2mnths lack of cashflow has crushed her. My job has been slow for 2 mnths, which I have been looking for a new one, but work is picking up as we speak. I make good money when I have work. If we stay here we will be just fine but she wants us to get our own places. Ok, i can do that, except, this means we have to foreclose or claim bankruptcy. I do not want this. This will hurt my credit , and hers, and I feel there is no need for this to happen. anyways, since it is, I want to go now and start my life over. Ihave been distance from the social world for some time now, for my family sake. I am a devoted father and cannot stand the fact my little girl has to go through this. I am facing the fact that this is going to happen and living in the same house, knowing my wife doesnt want to be with/here now, is making me go crazy. She still wants to hug, ect. We have had no sex for atleat 3 mnths and counting. Iam nedding affection from and not getting it. Our insurance does not cover counseling. any help would be great. Thanks to all who have read and willing to give some form of possibe help.

Hi Azmzn,

Welcom to MB, this is a great place for support and learn about relationships (even tho our M's make it or not.)

I don't have any answers but some more questions if you don't mind. Have you read the information on the website? Even couple thinking about divorce can do plan A. Is she seeing someone else? Do you feel the financial situation is affecting her decision?

Many of us too, struggle to find the anwers finacially. Have you consulted with an attorney? Many give free consultations.

Blessings,

D.

Hi Azman,
Just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you, and I pray things will get better for you. The people on this board can be a great support to you, don't be afrain to post how you're feeling and what's going on. It has helped me so much in the past to be in contact with someone who has been there.
God bless you.
KK

I do not think nor believe there is any one else involved. No signs that is. And she, being a financial freak, that I do beleive that finances is her biggest issue. im sure there is more to it but she seems to be hush hush about her true feelings. She swears to me that divorce is not even a thought. She says she needs some time away from everything to gather herself. How much time?????? Getting our own places will and is going to be tough. How long should I wait. I have not had sex w/ her in 4mnths and me being so attracted to her I am just scared I wouldnt be able to hold out, sexually and mentally, to wait for her. I felt the same a feww months ago but asked guidance from her and god and I succeded. Now i guess its her turn. She will not let me help and tells me she can only do this on her own. I just wish she would tell me her true feelings. There is definitely more to the story than she is telling me. Thanks

PS: Is there a site or some info for what the abbreviatins like, w, h , ect. I seem to get confused on trying to figure some of those out.Thanks again