What a week!!!!!
Lat Sunday my YD rolled a 174 game in a tournament, her highest game!!! I was there so where her grandparents. She comes home and calls dad right away!!! UGH!!!

Wednesday was my OD 18th birthday. She had stated that she wanted this Yankee pullover, said that I had been buying things all along for her and that I like buying things for her when I see something that she is going to like. She was ok with that!!! She told her dad last weekend about the pullover (he's the Yankee fan), he called Wednesday morning (Mmmmmmmm new wife forgot to have him send a card) and said that he was sending money for her to get sweatshirt! UGH!!!! BUying her off!!!! UGH!!!!

They try so hard to win him over or keep his attention or whatever it is. And a month ago he couldn't stay an extra 2 days to watch them bowl. It makes me so mad that I am the one here 24/7 for them and he is the one that they try so hard to impress and please.

Found out that the health insurance dumped me when I was divorced, didn't know that til Tuesday when I tried to make an appointment. Had to take care of that yesterday, I had to pay to get back on the military plan. Someone should have told me before the divorce that I was going to be dumped, so that I could have taken care of it through the divorce proceedings. UGH!!!!

Found out today that son had gotten fired on Tuesday from his job. Find out that it was a wrongful firing and that the supervisor didn't have the authority to do that. So now son has to file a grieveness. He is not the intiative taking type guy so will probably have to push pretty hard on him to keep him going on this one!!!UGH!!!

OD called and left message today that I needed to call her ASAP. So did, she is bawling and I am not able to understand her. She had another accident, this time her fault, backed into some guy that made the statement "that I seen her and thought that I could get around her" The cop did not have this in his statement and couldn't understand why it was that I wanted it in the statement. After 15 minutes he agreed to put it in his report. UGH!!!! OD is hurting, but don't think that it is from the accident think that it is the Fibromyalgia that is getting her tongiht. She is to have bowled in a tournament again tomorrow, so don't know about that right now!!!

I have a collection agency on my butt for my surgery in Aug on a bill that hasn't been paid. Had to talk to the insurance company again today and hear someone else tell me that it was taken care of. NOT!!! UGH!!!!

The other aide in my room has been gone for two days, pretty rough on my own. I am also having a terrible time with reflux and haven't kept anything down for a week.

I am just tired and wanted someone to come home to that would care how my day, week was. And there wasn't anyone here!!!! Again I was cheated out of my mate for life!!! And it made me mad!!!!

Guess I can let this all get me down and keep me down or I can rise above it yet again and keep plugging along!!!!! I am just so tired!!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thinking of you.

Understand how you feel that they go all out to get dad's approaval. My OS does the same thing but his is that he doesn't mine if I know all the dumb teenage stuff he does however he never wants his dad to know. I finally figured out, he knows I will love him but even at 18.5, he is afarid that dad might stop loving him like dad did mom.

Hope your next wk is better.

sing,

I never thought about the kids being afraid of dad stopping loving them like he did mom!!!

I don't know if it is rougher because the kids are older and keep so much inside or what!!!

The next week will get better!!!!

Thanks, for caring!!!
Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Yes,you are right. They see that dad has stoopped loving mom. And that is a fear. They know what their dad did, was in front of their eyes. The reality is hitting them hard, and they are going to fight to keep dad on their side. Yes, they have disrepsect towards you, cause you provide the food, the housing, the shelter, the bills, the electric. I get the same thing. They don't respect me, but my kids don't go to dad and want praise. My kids are all angry, and basically stay away as much as possible.

Would be nice if we all could form a group of betrayed women who have the kids and have a hugging session. But the problem is, we all want our hugs at different times. So it wouldn't work. If we had our spouses, then we could go to them and say I need a hug. A comforting hug.

The kids will see as they get older that we were there for them. They will see that dad left, and don't give a crap about their wife. But we will always be there for them.

Here is a hug {{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}} wish I could be there in person. I need one too. And my neck and back are aching so bad.

I also need a hug.... H just agreed to divorce...

I don't know now what to do... <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

just sad ((((((( HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS))))))))))

you will get thru it hun

((((((((((( Dawn ))))))))))))

Keep on posting here. We're here for you.

Karen

[[[[[[[[[[[[[JUST SAD]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[DAWN}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

sorry to hear of all your trouble. ill be praying for you. Its tough all we have to put up with ..all the extra stuff that we didnt agree to. I dint agree to being a single mom and having to make all the extra trips..home repairs, on call 24/7. No its not fair, that I have to go out at midnight and pick up son from band gig, transport drums and friends all the time

especially considering his mother id doing his laundry, while he is out and about playing batchelor.

And now prom is coming up..once again, I will be the single mom taking the pix and going to the promenade alone. That was the rough part at the Christmas dance. All the other girls had both parents there

but, different from you..my kids want nothing to do with father, they dont call him,tell him anything, or seek his approval. H thinks that will turn around..but all I see is them getting farther apart. His "quality" time is pretty much 45 min for pizza..once a week. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

Wee, know that I think of you often..same name and all. I will paray for you. Keep looking up!!! That really helps.

Smiles,
Dawn

Thanks all!!!

It was a gorgeous day here in SD, sun and warm. Hung sheets out to dry!!!!

I do get tired of taking care of all of these things alone, our prom is next weekend. But as I look back he was very rarely ever there anyways, so I did do things by myself, just had someone to complain to that I was by myself and wished he was there to have seen or whatever. Not that he cared anyways then or now.

Somedays I really think kids have his number and then the next they are seeking him out!!!! I always wanted them to have a good relationship with their dad, but didn't think that it should have to be me making sure that they did!!!! I stopped that finally!!! Guess it's new wifes job and she already blew it, no valentines cards, e mails only and blew OD birthday this week.

Oh well this is my life now and I can't let those things bring down!!!1

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<strong>I always wanted them to have a good relationship with their dad, but didn't think that it should have to be me making sure that they did!!!! I stopped that finally!!! </strong>

Whew! I'm glad you posted that Dawn. I was getting worried that you had forgotten that it really isn't your problem anymore. Your kids are old enough, and your H is too (well... according to his birth certificate anyways <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> ), to keep their relationships in check. It's not your responsibility. You've got enough to deal with, I'm sure.

Besides... you're getting what you say you wanted, right? The kids are continuing a relationship with their dad. They're not stupid.. you made sure of that when you raised them. Just be happy that they're being the "better people" by continuing the contact with him. That's really awesome, considering all the crap he's put you all through. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

Luv ya!
Karen
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

[[[[[[[[[dawn]]]]]]]]]]]

Well you're keeping your chin up... and that's a GOOD thing... all this stuff will pass and your kids WILL remember who was ALWAYS there for them...

Day-to-Day stuff sucks. Even when you have a partner <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> .

also hugs for JUST SAD.

Cali

Ya know how you wonder what more you can handle? Well...................I just sat and laughed when my OD showed me the tatoo that she got today. What else was I to do?

I know that my kids realize who has been there 24/7 for them, they do show it periodically, not as much as I need to see it sometimes!!!! But that's my problem right?

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Cali, Nice to hear from you, How you liken the new house? Got things were you want them yet? You never sent me your address, I have a gift that I wanted to send to you. E mail notinsd2001@yahoo.com

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by daybreak:
<strong>Ya know how you wonder what more you can handle? Well...................I just sat and laughed when my OD showed me the tatoo that she got today. What else was I to do?

I know that my kids realize who has been there 24/7 for them, they do show it periodically, not as much as I need to see it sometimes!!!! But that's my problem right?

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Dawn,

Glad you are doing better.

Not sure if I laugh or scream about the tatto. Most likely depend on what & where. Be sure & watch it. We had a student let one get horrible infected, he was too afrid to tell him mom, he finally let the school (HS) nurse call her & get her to take him to the doctor. To quote him, one of his homeboys did it! Wish we had taken photos to make posters to remind kids to be careful; but they are teenagers, and don't know the meaning of careful.

Like you I know my boys know that I have always been here 24/7 however sometimes it is nice to appericated. My whatever you call him, has moved back closer to us without the OW (still in contact) and the boys are really enjoying it. I am too, so much of the pressure is off me. I didn't know I was so stressed till he started handling some of the stuff. He had always travled so much, I was like a single parent 60$ of the time anyway.

Hope you have a good week.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Wow Dawn,

We are pretty much going through the same things. Found out last month that I was dumped by the medical system...I thought I posted it--but maybe not. Great how they notified us of that.

Oh well...just another hurdle to get over. The kids are struggling to develop some type of relationship with their father also--it is sad...The reality is...I want them to have a relationship with him...because logically I know it is good for them...but another part of me wants them to totally reject him--because of what he has done to us. Sad, but true. I hate it when he is involved in any way with my kids--I feel my blood pressure go up each and every time.

Probably doesn't matter what he would or could do for us at this time...I am still too "rejected" to want him around my kids at all. He gets criticised if he doesn't tho too--

Guess as time goes by these feelings will also improve--I hope.

I HATE DIVORCE.

Take Care Pat

And it's Monday!!! And OD got stinking drunk last night,cuz she could!!!! So had to go through all of that, she's 18 and thinks she
is all grown up!! Last night was a one time thing and she just hhaaaaaadd to do it, if you know what I mean.

Still pissed me off as to how she could be so stupid though!!!! Stayed very calm and sent her brother to get her. She had to leave her car and questioned me this morning when I was leaving to go to work "Aren't I taking you to work so I can get my car?" My reply "Nope, got to go,love you have a nice day" Natural consequences, got to love them, when they work for you!!

Called her dad, didn't seem to concerned.Was the one big point of contention between us, I reacted and he didn't act at all!!!! Not much help and I guess that I knew he wouldn't be, but still called him so that he is disrupted in his activities by the events of his children, petty probably, but makes him take a role in their lives none the less.

Makes me not want to get up tomorrow morning as to what the day may bring. Alot of stress!!! The reflux is still getting me big time, it's so uncomfortable!!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />