Does it have to be a lump sum at a set date during the month, or can it be a once a week payment on a certain day every week?

My STBX and I are still having a heated debate about alimony. He said no, then yes, and now no again. He says he can't afford to pay it because of the way he gets paid. He gets a weekly check of one amount and then a large check at the first of the month. He said that because of the house payment for me and the kids, the child support he will have to pay, and then his apartment rent due all at the first of the month, he can't pay alimony. But, he does promise to send money each week. Well, I need this in writing and just wondered if any has experienced or has heard of a spouse getting alimony payments of a different way other than the traditional lump sum monthly payment.

I know I should get a lawyer, but they are so expensive. It is just not something I can afford at this time.

Thanks for your input!

You better go through the system. One, he can choose to not pay for 1 month, 2 months, or whatever. And where are you going to go to get your money. You can go to mediation, and have everything signed by a mediator. But your paychecks should go through the courts. That way if he decides to not pay, you go through the courts. The courts assign your check once a month, for reasons that their are so many checks going out.

All your husband has to do, is set aside each paycheck money for your alimony, and the other check he gets set aside money too. He will have to budget, and that is all there is to it. The system is not going to change for him, he will have to adjust to the system. That way you are sure, what day your check should come. And if for some reason it is a month late, then you call and they will find out what is going on.

The payment can be whatever you two decide. It can be on a daily basis if you both want it. Typically, it is monthly, however, I have a similar problem in that to pay everything at the beginning of the month would cause me to have nothing for 2 weeks. So, my ex has 'graciously' allowed me to pay her twice a month, which makes it much more palatable.

I can tell you. If it will smooth things between you both, you will be more likely to get the money, than if he has to decide to pay his elctricity or you. That will only cause problems. Perhaps the twice a month thing would work for you? But yes, it absolutely should be in writing, but there is NOTHING that says it has to be anything other than what you both choose it to be.

It's like a car payment... there's nothing stopping him from paying you early... just on a different date. Like if it's due the 1st of May, he can pay you that payment by April 15th.

Who cares? Alimony is his responsibility... not necessarily yours. Why weekly? Do it monthly. It doesn't have to be a lump sum, though you can request it.

Mine is going through as an "income deduction order", it comes out of his pay before he gets it, and the state is going to send it to me. This is my first month so will have to let you know how I get my first one.