Well, if you read my other thread then you know the guy I really wanted to start dating emailed me that he found someone in his town...

I accept that, although it still made for a crummy start for a weekend...

And you'll know that right after I got the email I go to a ball game and ex shows up with his g/f, her kids, and my kids at the baseball game...looking like the nice family...don't want him back, but why the heck couldn't I have had the kids this weekend, they always know how to cheer me up.

I go swimming yesterday, there is nothing that can compare to the feeling I get while swimming, nothing that can compare to the stress reliever I get either. Swimming was awesome as usual.

Today after church I go swimming again. I was in the water swimming my laps and thinking, "Okay so I don't have a date and probably won't find another man like him for a long time, but as long as I have swimming it just doesn't seem that bad, and the next two weekends I am going to up my swimming on the weekends to two times a day.

Then I think, if I had to give up swimming for a man, I wouldn't. I enjoy it more than a date.

I get out of the pool, feeling awesome. Go into the locker room when another lady approaches me and says "Wow what a stress reliever." and I say, "You don't even know!" and she says, "Oh yea I do, and I am so sad that for the next three weekends the pool will be closed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

CLOSED! My heart sank.

Okay, they say things happen in threes. This was three things, but I think I'll lock myself in my house until tomorrow....It's safer that way!

Anyway, I talked to a friend and she told me about her weekend, it sure made my little problems look down right petty...So how about yours, was it good, or was it just as bad or worse than mine?

ANNA

<small>[ March 30, 2003, 04:51 PM: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</small>

Anna--I can relate to all you just posted. I do not even think I could handle my WS, OW and my boys hanging out together. That is a real cut to the heart I am not ready for. I get FILLED with pain just thinking of WS and OW together just in my mind. What a huge feeling of rejection.

Anna---I love to swim too and boy, what a treasure it is to relieve stress that way. I can remember, during the worst part of the infidelity crisis, swimming and crying in thankfulness that I had the opportunity and means to belong to a pool. It is such an endorphin high that it gives such a sense of peace and well-being.

Dating is not what it is appears to be. It doesn't solve the pain and may even make it more complex at this point so you may have been saved more heartache.

TW

TW,

It's easier for me on the ex thing because of the abuse, I have to think, better her than me, but still there's a sadness because even though I can't think of being with him anymore, I still have trouble picturing myself with another man. I think it's just hard when you thought your life would be with one person forever.

I did the same thing through my saddness of my divorce. Swimming was my escape and still is.

I am not that into recreational swim, just lap.

I wonder why it is more of an endorphin high than anything else I do.

You're right about dating not solving the pain, and actually after this experience it made me realize even more why they say to first be healthy then date. I am disappointed but I think it's a natural disappointment. If this would have happened during a time I was going through a depression it would have been so difficult to pull myself out of it.

Good luck with your recovery and continue to work out and swim!

ANNA

P.S.

The life guard must of been going through his own dating crisis today. The whole swim I listened to the song by Sheryl Crow and Kid Rock, "I put your picture away..." Over, and over, and over, and over.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

<small>[ March 30, 2003, 10:24 PM: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</small>