Hi there,

I was talking to my SIL (and yes she still is, even though her brother and I have divorced) and she told me a disturbing thing about the Xmas visit when X took Clicketty Clack to his parents. She, his mother and another sister all heard CC tell X to remember to get his will from his parents. She apparently said this several times.

Not that the will in question is valid anymore, but I guess she wanted to see it anyway.

Thinking about my kids and their future inheritance, I wrote to him telling him I knew what had gone on, and that I was concerned that she be asking about his will before they were even engaged. I also made sure that he knew that if it was not as much in favour of the kids as before our divorce, when he died I would be getting them to contest it.

Well he wrote back a kinda cordial reply, telling me not to worry about it, but here is the part that just GOT to me.

"Clicketty Clack is sticking her neck out by leaving South Africa and doesn't want ot be stranded here or in Australia in the event of my death, as she has her own stuff to get back to SA, as well as having to start over again."

I couldn't help it.....my reply to this was

"Oh PLEASE! You are being taken for a ride and everyone here knows it."

Am I the only one that thinks that this woman is out for all she can get?????

Yeah, you're right, she's a gold digger.

And your ex is in fog. She's not even engaged to or married to him, and she's anticipating the death of his parents and HIS death? She's a vulture. (What's the emoticon for gagging?)

Wow! What's her #, I want to find out where she bought that pair of Ba##s, I need a set.

Oh yes. Has your x had a chat with all her THREE x-husbands?
Just wondering how much CC sucked off from them. Of course your x doesn't want to know/hear, and CC would deny the truth.
My WH's OW#1 was after his dollars big time. She knew his parents have money.
WH blew few thousands of his grandmother's inheritance buying gifts, dinners, trips away, helping her around house, financing cars etc. etc. All that money should have gone to our kids.
CC sounds a lot like OW#1, designer clothes and strappy sandals. She sucks money off from benefit, works part time and rich daddy sends extra $$, very spoilt. Then rips off more from guys she gets her hooks on. Just saw her having lunch with my landlord ( I guess she's part of my life one way or the other!). I really feel like warning this landlord, he's a decent guy, as far as I know. Someone asked my H's friend, when he heard H had got involved with OW#1: "Has 'H' got money?" H knew about her tendencies, but the fog was wayyy too thick.
He was so "in love."
Jacky , don't worry, CC will be history long before your x's funeral!!!
Just wishing your x would wake up before he marries her. It's good his family know about CC's intentions.
And about CC starting over, talk about someone who did it, one strong, brave lady with 3 kids, you!
Isn't your x sooo thoughtful...poor CC, it's so hard, maybe a nail could crack while packing her clicky sandals.
I'm going to move back to Europe in 8 weeks, with 2 kids, not a cent from WH to help to start over, 25 hours on the flights, 3 stops. But then I'll be back home, with my family and friends, and not having to bumb into OWs, not to have this in front of my face anymore, 3 years was enough!
Your story has been inspiring for me. I know that the kids won't be happy not being able to see their dad for long periods at the time.
It's not ideal, but what do you do, when somebody's in fog with an OW.

Nina:
I'm a guy and I think she's a gold-digger. More like a vulture, actually.
I feel sorry for your ex. Get one of his close male friends or someone he trusts to warn him seriously. Your kids' interests are at stake.

muzohead

He ain't listening muzo, not to me, nor his family, nor his special sister, the one he ALWAYS took advice from. We are all wrong because he is sooooo in lurvvvvvvvvvv.

Another email today, part of which read:

You need to stop worrying about what my state of affairs are, that is not your role anymore.

And he also told me to get a life, get a job, etc.

To which I replied:

If the things you do affect the kids it certainly is, and always WILL be my concern, and neither you nor CC can tell me it isn't. Like it or not, if you make decisions that are not in the kids best interests, I will be following it up. I would expect no less from you.

Me worry about when you die? It never occurred to me until CC brought it up in front of your family. They told me over concern for the future of the children, X, and I felt it needed to be addressed. And as for the funds, there are plenty more years for you to make money and put it away, build up assets etc. The kids deserve their share of that.

I have a life thank you very much. I am enjoying it immensely. May I suggest that it is not YOUR role to tell ME what to do anymore either.

I am sorry you and I can't get along better.

I mean, the woman is GOOOOOOOOOOD at this. EVERYTHING I say is turned around to make me look like the baddie. I need to get back into a rigid Plan B, because while I am not hurt anymore, I am angry! And I would rather not be.

Bears, I am sorry to hear that things are tough for you. Thanks for the kind reminder that I did have to start again with the three kids on my own while he was overseas, just like you will. It is easier for me in many ways because he is OS. I am dreading him being closer.

Love and light,

Jacky

hmmmm, what if all of her X husbands committed apparent suicide? or were involved in accidental deaths? and in countries with poor legal systems for investigations?

HOLY CRAP BATMAN! there is a black widow in our midst!

Two words:

"Preying Mantis"

Jacky,

I don't know what the laws are there, but can you ask about having it mandatory in the divorce papers for a life Insurance Policy with the kids (or you) as beneficiary to help support your kids in the event he dies before they are 18?

that way you know the kids are taken care of--

As far as his will goes..unfortunately, he isn't required to leave the kids anything..

And if she really is a "gold-digger" then when they marry..she will bleed his finances dry..and they will have MORE problems than you and he ever thought of having..and he will wonder what happened to the woman he "loved" so much..

And also look at it this way...what will she blow the money on?? probably nice designer clothes in which she will wear when he is at work as she mingles w/ other men looking for one who makes even more money than him..when she finds one she will move on..but not without taking some of his money with her..

Did she get lessons from Jethro's mistrsses or something? Is there a secret school that they are going to? An online program or something?

I agree about the insurance. But the inheritance needs to be addressed legally. I believe since the divorce is so new, and the affair was reason for the divorce that your lawyer should intervene stat.

It's for the kids. And she is SHOWING HER COLORS NOW. THE FAMILY OF X IS NOW SEEING HER FOR WHO SHE IS. The trickle down effect may take a little time. But it will probably cost your x a whole lotts dinero.

SINCE SHE'S FROM SOUTH AFRICA, I SAY SHE IS MORE OF A GREAT WHITE SHARK THAN A LITTLE OLD GOLDDIGGER. My goodness. Wanting a piece of the pie already. And the children are the permanent ones.

I sure would like to click her clack.