I want my fiance to sign a prenup. He thinks I'm being paranoid but I want to protect my future. What should we do? Do any of you have one?

If you're bringing a sizeable net worth (or a potential inheritance) into the marriage, it likely <I>must</I> happen for you to be adequately protected. If not, then you may want to just chat with a lawyer who specializes in them to find out what you should do. If you decide to go ahead with it, let your lawyer deal with him (or his lawyer) on this topic, and that will allow you to maintain your image as the "good person" (while the atty. does all the hard-hearted stuff).

engaged:<P>I absolutely think that you should sign a prenuputal agreement, but not the one that you're thinking of. I would wholeheartedly suggest that you get the book <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6060_gift.html" TARGET=_blank>The Four Gifts of Love</A> from this website, and read it with your fiance. And then sign the certificate that says that you will commit to providing these four gifts to your partner for the rest of your marriage.<P>This book teaches the MarriageBuilder's philosophy on how to have a successful marriage---and the beginning of your marriage is the best time to learn these skills. I've given this book as a wedding present several times, and it makes a good text for pre-marriage instruction. In this book you'll find the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3500_policy.html" TARGET=_blank>Policy of Joint Agreement</A>---this rule states that you should never do anything without a mutually enthusiastic agreement with your spouse. That would include signing a prenup. You need to negotiate this with your fiance, and respectfully persuade him to do so (or perhaps to be respectfully persuaded by him in the opposite direction). The only way that you should do this is if you both are in agreement.<P>In general, a prenup would seem to be tipping the marriage towards failure. Unless one of you is bringing huge sums of money, property, or heirlooms to the marriage, it doesn't make much sense. Even if you are, I'd encourage you to focus more on what it takes to keep romantic love alive in a marriage rather than making sure that you'll get back all your stuff when the marriage ends.