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tough love questions
#748804 04/24/03 06:05 PM
Joined: Apr 2001
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JJ71197 Offline OP
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JJ71197
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I know I haven't posted in awhile. So howdy to all.....

Anyway I got a question and can't wait to hear the different opinions..

1. Why is it when you treat someone with the utmost respect and care and you just treat them like gold THEY WALK ALL OVER YOU?

2. When you treat them piss poor and like sh** they want you even more and can't get enough of you??

3. How do you stop treating them like gold when it has been a little while and your tired of it and well but you don't want to let go, but your tired of being treated like sh**????

Please someone enlighten me!! I need it... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />
Re: tough love questions
#748805 04/24/03 07:49 PM
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tossedwave Offline
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Dr Dobson in the book TOUGH LOVE explains this pulling back and forth in relationships. That is where I first learn that letting someone walk all over you will be a detriment to any relationship.

I do not understand this personally but it is intriguing when someone is hard to get. If you feel you are losing, you try to make it work...The chase is sometimes all that some people care about.

TW
Re: tough love questions
#748806 04/24/03 08:20 PM
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crushed but trying Offline
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crushed but trying
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for question 1, I think people take you for granted when you treat them too well. I am just guessing from my own experience. as for questions 2 and three I give up? I don't have the answers but am looking
Re: tough love questions
#748807 04/24/03 09:21 PM
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adgirl48 Offline
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I don't think they want you when you treat them like sh**, I think they want you when they see that they can't walk all over you and still watch you beg and plead and act pathetic. There is no respect there if all you do is beg the person who hurt you in the first place (been there, not pretty). So if you are confident, strong and have enough self-respect to say "hey, you know, I Love you but I am not going to tolerate this- make your choice" then they think, oh wow, I can't keep walking all over her/him and be a cakeeater. I am really going to lose him/her if I keep on. So then some stay, and some go.
Re: tough love questions
#748808 04/24/03 09:33 PM
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JJ71197 Offline OP
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Adagirl,
Noone says I'm pleading for anything..
I will not nor will I ever.
I have done so much for this person. 1.becuase they asked me to and 2. becuase I wanted too and then well you find the real stuff out. But if I push someone away and don't treat them so nice. They want me even more.

Ty for the comments all
Re: tough love questions
#748809 04/25/03 04:48 PM
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adgirl48 Offline
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jj, oops, ok you didn't say you were pleading. Guess I got caught up in what I did!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />
Re: tough love questions
#748810 04/26/03 10:36 AM
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JJ71197 Offline OP
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No prob adgirl. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
I just can't figure this out. Just when you think you know them bam they surprise you.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Here is a concept....
Wouldn't it be nice if someone would treat you they way you treat them. That way if you treat them like Sh** that is how you are treated...
Hmmmmmm and If you treat them with respect that is how they will treat you..
Ok someone pinch me and wake me up I'm dreaming again......

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