Well my friends and MB-family,

Tomorrow is yet another court date, and I'm nervous about it. First, to start off with, going to court makes me nervous because I'm a law-abiding citizen type of person and the legal system is so unpredictable. Thankfully, our magistrate is a pretty easy-going lady, and pretty informal--that helps!!

Second, I've spent the last two days preparing for this meeting, because I have decided I'm not leaving that courtroom until some kind of child support is ORDERED. StbxH absolutely refuses to pay ANYTHING unless the court orders him to, and I have to tell you, I doubt if he will after that either! I can not IMAGINE how he can sleep at night knowing he does not care for his own children--but then again, he's never really cared about whether he hurt us or not has he?? Why should now be any different??

Third, I have decided that I am going to ask for every single dollar to which I am entitled--and I have gather evidence and researched the laws and just photocopied my little butt off to back each and every request. I asking for 5 years of alimony (we were living at a level of $7500/mo until he moved out--now it's right around $1000/mo!). I asking for child support based on his potential to earn and the reasonable expectation as proven by the past 3 years taxes. Finally, I'm asking for the entire equity of the house in my name based on the fact that he received his entire inheritance AND his portion of the equity of the house already and blew it on his sluts (plus, by having sluts for our entire marriage, it shows fault and gross disregard for the marriage AND I have 85% of parental responsibility and always have AND I worked to increase the assets while he depleted them!).

Anyway, please hold me in your prayers tomorrow, okay? I'm praying that for once some justice is done for what the kids and I have gone through--and that FOR ONCE stbxH is held accountable for his actions and choices. I'm hoping tomorrow will be the day that he begins to pay for abandoning his wife and children, for cheating at will, and for raging at us and abusing us all those years. Don't get me wrong--I know our legal system is the WRONG place to go for justice, but it would just be so wonderfully validating to have the judge tell him that his behavior is going to cost him!! Right now, he's living high off the hog and getting away with it--and no one (other than me) has told him that it's not cool to just dump his family!!

I'll write tomorrow night and let you'all know how it went! Thanks for your hugs and prayers!

CJ

Praying for you. You are doing a great job, copying your butt off, and providing a home for your children. Court is a system that makes us abiding law people nervous. I shook at court, and took deep breaths. If you can, take a book to read, or have something in your purse that you can hold that is comforting. A little stuffed bunny, or something that is your comfort zone.

GoD will be with you, and prayers are going your way.

Remember the ambassador? The white bear with wings? If he's still around, he wants to be your friend.

I just saw this and hope it went okay. You want child support till they leave college if the court will order it. And you should ask. You'll be paying for them for that long. He should too.

Faithfulwife, remember the alimony is taxable. So what you get, won't be the full amount. I asked about it being non-taxable, and no go. So my husband gets to claim it on his taxes, and I get less. Really great isn't it.

Court, is not the greatest place to be. But one thing, is you will find out what your husband was really like inside. My husband got all red faced, went ballistic a few times, his lawyer told him to calm down. Husabnd also, got up and left a few times. He has problem with anger management. You will find out some really bad things about your husband. I did, and it really hurts, that I fell in love with someone like this. And to see the pain they cause, and to see that they don't care, really hurts. Hopefully, yours will be a nice calm time. Yours will be civilized. Ours wasn't. So be it. I now know, and have for the last 3 years, that my husband doesn't love me, doesn't like me, doesn't care about me, doesn't care what happens to me, and is totally selfish. So be it. This is his life, and he can live it in sin and lust.

Good luck with court, it is going to be hard, and I will pray for you.

I hope and pray it went well for you. Hope the judge will spout out a few words of wisdom. He probably will at your stbxh.

And I am totally understanding about the xh living like a king and holding court with the s5luts while we stay home and do the best we can and hold our families together.

You did all you could. You really did. And God knows. Your family knows. And it won't be the first time that this judge has seen this unfortunate scenario unfold before he/she.

Sometimes we HAVE TO LOOK TO JUSTICE SYSTEM WHEN THE WS JUST DOESN'T WANT TO COMPLY WITH WHAT IS WITHIN THE LIMITS OF THE LAW. Then you have to legally perform a WWF smackdown on them. Know all about it and we'll be in court again next week.

Am feeling poopy. BAck on antibiotics-bro in law called in some yesterdayl. Son was dx with strep for second time (his dad didn't finish up his antibiotic on son's last strep go round last month) and as that I'm primary and full time mom, it's ME WITH THE STREP AGAIN!

Faith:

I am really worried about you. Your posts are getting more negative and negative. We are aware of your pain, but please try to be more encouraging when someone's going to court.

Have been praying for you for some time.

NOTE TO SELF: DO NOT EXPECT JUSTICE FROM THE LEGAL SYSTEM.

The status conference yesterday did not go very well. Nothing major changed or happened, as it was just a meeting to see our status, I guess. I did file an amended Financial Affidavit to show more accurately my current financial situation. I even made copies of the bank statements and bank accounts to prove my claims. My stbxH never did get me a copy of HIS Financial Affidavit, so I had to go down to court and make my own copy...and he lied of course. He claimed $1400/mo when he makes more like $4000/mo that I can prove...and he's probably hiding even more! It makes me SICK!

Anyway, the judge asked me if I wanted to keep running our business and I said I enjoyed what I do and enjoyed the freedom it offers me, but my five-year plan is to be working as a life/relationship coach. However, for now, I like the business and there are a few new avenues of potential income and I'm doing well with the customers we have...except that stbxH has some knowledge/skill that is necessary for running the company, and I've asked him for a year to teach me, and he refuses to do so, in order that he might maintain control. So far, not too bad, right??

Here's where I kind of went downhill. StbxH pipes in that he will not work for the company as long as I am running it. He does not TRUST me to do the work that I say I'm going to do!! Then he brings out a "To Do" list from before he left (5 months ago) and says, "I gave her this list of things to do, and I still do not know which have been done or not!" AARRGGHH

OMG!!

I've only been here 3 years, and I double posted!

heehee <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

<small>[ April 27, 2003, 01:11 AM: Message edited by: FaithfulWife ]</small>