Hi. My name is Eric and I have been wondering if anyone has actually had any success with internet dating sites. I haven't met a single REAL person that has. I've gone to a few chat rooms... but have only met one person that has been worth keeping in touch with.

If you have, I'd love to hear the stories. If not, oh well. The internet is nice because it's secure and for us shier types, it's safe and you can see what you type/say before you send something dumb. On the down side, she's probably NOT a hot redhead... she's probably a 12 year old boy or a married older man.

How to become social again... avoid falling into a rebound thing... getting rid of emotional baggage... LOL - and I thought the hard part of my dv was over!!!

I met my wife through an internet dating site. Was it successful? Well, we married. But the marriage has been a disaster. But that can happen whether the internet was involved or not. The problem with it is that it is easy to lie or misrepresent yourself with these sites. So be extra careful.

Personally, no, I don't allow that kind of closeness to develop and the main place I post is here on MB.

But one of the rabbis in the synagogue I attend met her H on the internet. I don't know the quality of their marriage, we are only acquaintances and our conversation isn't personal. It's about Torah or mutual friends or spiritual topics, or about the state of the Middle East (and not in depth there either.)

I guess it could happen. Another friend is dating someone who she connected with through a high school reunion site and it seems to be going well. The difference between meeting a person in chat rooms or on the web and reconnecting with a classmate is that you already know who the classmate is.

I hope you find someone, someone real nice!

Hi Eric,

Funny this should come up...

My W was talking about it the other night. She said "I don't know how anybody could do that. All the couples I know who met that way are unhappy together." I sat for a moment in silence (I would have said "stunned silence", but nothing W says stuns me anymore), and replied (softly) "You met OM on the Internet." She paused, .... "But that was different!", she said.

"That's what they all say.", I replied.

-AD

But wait a minute......I AM a hot redhead! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I did meet a neat man in a chatroom, we dated for about 8 months and are still friends. On the upside, he's witty, interesting, kind, affectionate.....on the downside, he can't seem to hold a job and has all these dreams for the future that never seem to gel. He had a hard time committing to Friday night, let alone a life together. Maybe cus he's on the computer all the time, looking for Utopia?

I do wish it was that easy tho, where does a mom of 3 with sole custody and no interest in bars meet men? I go to the biggest church in town, but it's 90% 2 parent families and the unmarried men are a little old.

Sigh......

Well, there's a hot redhead that works in the business next door to me... and after some goading and dares and teasing and cajoling... I finally screwed up my courage to ask her out... and recieved probably the nicest and politest NO THANK YOU I have ever received. So much for fiery huh?

Honestly... she was so sweet about it... <shakes head in wonder> Too bad she has a boyfriend. I think people should wander around with their availability posted on their foreheads...
- Single and Available
- Single not looking
- Married and Being Faithful
- Married and Looking
- Too Young
- Too Old
- If you're close enough to read this sign then you're about to get kicked.

Hi Eric! I am a success story - I posted several Personals Ads online - used Yahoo, MSN, Largeandlovely.com as well. My future wife posted on largeandlovely the week before I posted and she answered my ad! We emailed for almost a month, then I gave her my phone number - no big rush and told her to call me anytime. I was emailing 6 different ladies at the same time. She called me one day - a week later - and we talked for almost 3 hours. She came over to see me almost a month later. We talked all the rest of that day, half the night, and most of the rest of the next day. (As you can see, we both seriously believe in COMMUNICATION.)
Bottom line - we knew we were right for each other. That was 3 1/2 years ago. Last week we just celebrated our 3rd Wedding Anniversary - and we still talk a lot! Sure, we've had bumps, trials, and other things along the way - but bottom line is - we love each other deeply because we believe love is an ACTION, not just based on looks, etc. Love is doing what you can for your Mate. Love is sticking with your Mate no matter what.
Yes, Internet Personals DO work!
Best of luck to you.
Harold

I met my h on the net...playing 'slingo'. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> And while we have certainly had our ups and downs, they would have been just the same regardless of where we found each other.

Annavon, my h, too, sat around with big dreams and little else. But, since we've been married, we've started working on making those dreams come true together. Of course, that's also what we'd be doing no matter how we met.

I think there are lots of nuts on the net but that there are also lovely, lonely people just like us and just like meeting any other way, you have to weed through the junk and find the treasures (even if they do need a little polishing to make them shine).

Good luck, Lyxa.

Lyxa,
I hear ya. I wish the men that hit on me had a sign on their forhead. MARRIED.
It's not that I'm looking. I'm still closing down shop here and working on myself. It's just, I'm NOT going to be the OW or anything close to it.
Is this what I have to look forward to?

Aly

Yeah, I'm terrified of becoming the OM for a married woman... or people even thinking such things. I know, going forward for me, that my own perception of myself in this manner is going to be an issue for me.

So, it's Sat. night and I don't have anybody to sit next to me on the couch and watch Red Green and sci fi on PBS. And somewhere across town there's this nice single guy with a job and nothing pierced who's thinking the same thing. How on earth are we ever gonna connect?

And why is it that the guy who gave me 41 roses for my birthday is totally unsuitable for me? And the guy I really liked got cold feet cuz I have 3 kids?

Sigh......it's impossible. I'd make such a good wife too, really, I would. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I have determined the internet is just like anything else...there's weirdos, married people looking for affairs, and nice people...You just got to weed them out.

BTW, my ex-coworker was one of those married people on the internet...disgusted me because he put...Christian, goes to church once a week, all my friends are married so I don't know many single people...."durrrr, of course you don't know many single people, you are married...."

The week before I left my work, his profile was still up, he told me how he and his wife went for a walk the night before and how they went in homes looking at different houses and wishing they would have picked a certain style instead of the one they chose... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

ANNA

Annavon,
I hear ya. I sat home this weekend too while STBXH was playing Disney dad.
If I hear one more time;"Your still so young and beautiful, you will find someone else, it won't be a problem for you." UUUGG!
I just want a guy friend I can rely on who I can cook a nice meal for and not feel like I have to put out!
I just want someone who is happy with the little things in life.
Well, for now, I live my life and let God do the rest. He will put someone in my path, I'm sure.

Aly

Well, so far this is what I've learned from the internet:
- If they try to cyber you, start talking religion. It makes them go away. ;-)
- If they won't send you a picture that looks like a real picture, dump them.
- If they won't send you another picture, then the first one was probably fake.
- If they start venting about anything or asking about where you think the "relationship" will go, it's symptomatic of deeper issues... and it's only a matter of time before they try to cyber you.
- If you chat more than 4 times without recieving a current picture or arranging for a phone call or actual meeting, dump them.

I was set up on a blind double date by a friend with his wife's sister for Saturday. It was fun. Felt like we were chaperoning the married ones though. LOL.

Lyxa,

Are you doing chat lines or yahoo & match personals?

I stay away from chat lines. I do look at personals and like I said I met one guy that seemed very nice.

I have a friend who does personals as well. She just went out with a guy who said the first lady he went out with came to the date with a print out of his profile and wanted to discuss it. That's weird! The second lady was nice and I can't remember if she had a hang up, however, she said that she went out with a man twice before he finally fessed up to being married. He said no one he dated looked like their pictures, but commented to my friend that she actually looked better than her pictures, which I agree with that.

My friend tells me I am much cuter than my pictures, but that's okay with me, I'd rather meet the guy and have him be glad I look better than picking pictures that look better than I really am and having the guy be disappointed.

I am still not sure match or yahoo is the way to go, I do think it is being proactive and I like using it as one avenue to date. However, I don't see how anyone can tell from a few pictures and a profile whether that person is "their match". I sure can't!

Well, good luck with finding someone.

ANNA

Anna, I agree with you.....chat rooms are mostly losers. But I recently met a guy through Yahoo personals who looks promising. I haven't met him in person yet, just been chatting.....but if what he says is true, he's a great catch....41, never married, faculty at the university (I looked that up, it's true). Who knows, we'll see.

Lyxa, you're assesments look right on! I don't have a really good pic of me, so mine probly deters people......but everyone thinks I"m cute in person, lol. (I don't think you can believe men who call you gorgeous tho.....pleeeeeese!)