I had a dream about a month after D-Day (early July)... my then-wife and I were walking along a trail around a lake. The trail was narrow and at one point, to stay parallel with me, she walked onto a side path... our trials continued to diverge and to continue our conversation, we had to keep raising our voices. Finally, I got tired of yelling back and forth and stopped. Knowing that the trails came back together at this one spot ahead... I ran to this scenic place that intrudes into the lake where golden leaves from autumn fell around a bench. I had a new wedding ring in my pocket.
I waited and waited for her wondering what was taking so long for her to get to this most beautiful of places. I was going to propose to her again. The dream ended with her never showing up.
...I hope the symbolism is as obvious to you all as it was and still is to me. The dream stayed with me as we struggled with IC and MC and reconciliation.
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In early October, the dream finished. I finally heard her slowly coming towards me. I was fingering the new ring, but the gorgeous afternoon had faded through sunset and into a chill twilight. I felt myself have a seizure and she came around the bend in the trail, speaking to someone over her shoulder. She saw me fall, but didn't see the ring bounce from my hand under a tree. She held my head until the seizure passed. Then a voice, her lover's voice called to her from the darkness. She kissed my forehead, told me I'd be fine, and ran off into the darkness after that voice.
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A week later I found (snooping) a new calling card and all of the OM's contact info hidden away in her personal belongings. Something inside me died, my heart hardened to her, and three days after finding that, I asked for a divorce and never looked back. Since then, everything that she has done has validated my decision to divorce her and the dream has come true... in a many different senses. She continues to self-destruct following that voice in the darkness. I'm grateful everyday that she's not my responsibility and not on my "watch" anymore.
