Well write it on the calendar folks...as of May 23, 2003, I am a divorced woman. Gee, I feel so cliche! I'm a forty year old, divorced mother of two! Sounds like a personals ad, doesn't it? heehee

Court was actually kind of pleasant. It was short and to the point; the judge signed the decree; and that was that...it was over. Yes, I got some child support and arrears! YAY! That was the main thing I was concerned about--the rest...well frankly I know I can provide for myself and the kids by myself if I have to!

So it's done! I'm single! I feel mostly happy and relieved, and just a teeny bit sad because I never really wanted a divorce--it just had to happen. The kids and I will be moving on June 7th to our townhome, so we are busy with plans for the future.

CJ

WOOHOO!!!! I know it isn't what you wanted to begin with, but I'm so happy that when it came down to actually getting the divorce that it is OVER.

I'm so happy for you and you get to go step out into a new job, new house, and keep the kids and the critters. The door is opening on your new life <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

Maybe soon I will officially be divorced, too! Of course, that means another 40 year old with 2 kids out there, LOL. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Lori

((((((((((CJ))))))))))

I also saw you had a job and moving. Life sure is-a-changin'.

I think it's going to be uphill from here girl!

Go get em!

BTW, a friend of mine said one day, "Did you remember it's the aniversary of your divorce? I was May 6th." I said, "Nope...it didn't even cross my mind." Time flies.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Take care,

ANNA

I am hoping I am single by my 40th in Feb.

Congratulations Faithful Wife. I was divorced 13 years ago (after 13 years of marriage and 3 kids) and I still celebrate the anniversary (Feb 2~Groundhog's Day), EVERY single year. You're in a wonderful position to find peace and harmony and discover all the things that are important to YOU. You can grow, without explaining the journey to anyone else, unless you choose to.

I remarried 18 months after my divorce was final and it has been the best 12 years of my life. There is life after divorce.

It's a new beginning. Embrace it.

~BTM

Faithfulwife - congratulations on your move ahead. It must feel good. I filed last year April 2002 and I am still not officiallydivorced. It has been a horrid divorce, SNL has shown his control and power. He still hasn't signed the papers, I did right away, and the judge will see my signature. So I have to go back to court in the first week of June. It was canceled for this past Friday.

The feeling of not being controlled, ruled, manipulated, must feel so good. To move into a new house, without the history of the house and your past, must feel good. That is why one reason I want out of this house. There is too much history, and memories. Plus this house is not finished, and a lot of fixing to be done.

Heck 40 years old, your a spring chick, and now you can start your new life. Been there myself - glad to see your 2nd marriage is successful. I will be probably 53 before this darn divorce is final. SNL just won't cooperate, and he is the one who stated in front of the judge that he agreed to the divorce decreement. And now he says he misunderstood. I signed, staying signed, and am not changing. He got his fair share, and I am moving on. No more control by Mr. Deceitful. He can now move on to another woman, if he wants.

To be single, to move ahead, is the goal of each and everyone of us women that were betrayed and lied and cheated on. My life will be much better without my x-husband for now. There are men out there who are respectful to women and treat their wife or frined with respect and thoughtfulness. I was at Home Depot today with my mother in-law. This gentleman, was looking at a product that we were, and he sorta was overlooking our shoulder, and he said, excuse me. Sorry if I was intruding on your view. So polite, and stood back, and said he would wait his turn. We allowed him to view too, and he was so nice. Talked gentle, caring, and thanked us for allowing him to view the demonstration. There are good, thoughtful, caring men.

Divorce is not a good thing. And the title is going to be divorced, is not one that I was looking at positively. But now, I am positive that this is what I needed. It feels good to not to have to do anything SNL says. To be afraid to do something, cause of his ballistic attitude. Like his mother and I today. She said, well we better get this or he will yell at us. I said yep.

To have your house the way you want it is good. A townhouse is a good deal. It is big enough, and small enough to care for.

Good luck in your new life, new home, new job, new family with you and your kids. God be with you.

Way to go!

Let's see. I think this calls for a party in the kingdom.....A MEGAPARTY!!!!!!!!!!!

We have tons to celebrate:
~~the Kingdom thread has reached 100 pages
~~the Kingdom thread will reach 1500 posts this week
~~CJ is finally single
~~I am having my 3-year MB anniversary on 5/30
I bet we can find some more reasons to celebrate if we try!

CJ,

Here's to the first day of the rest of your life (5/23/03) and to NEW memories!

You've come a long way baby! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Gayle

Do I get to smoke a Virginia Slims now??

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Lori--thanks for your WOOHOO! It really was not what I wanted, but I am so happy that I really gave it my VERY best shot. I really feel like I behaved well and did all I could, and that means so much to me. Here's hopin you join the "divorced and 40" club with me!

Anna--you know, a similar thing happened to me this year. It was the anniversary of the day he moved in with his OW (Feb. 3rd) and I got most of the way through the day before I even remembered, and when I DID remember, I honestly didn't care. MINDBLOWING! I NEVER thought I would get to that point.

newly--want to joing the "divorced and 40" club with me and bangarra?? Maybe we could make it a part of peachy's CSH=Celibate Sister Hood. heehee <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

BTM--there was a time in my life when I was afraid to embrace the future, especially if it was a future without my exH. Now I feel more excited and alive than I have in a long time...partially due to relief and partially due to finding joy again.

Faith4me--thank you for your well-wishes too. I'm sorry that SNL is still harping on you. He will never change, you know, so that means you have to change YOU. Keep your focus on YOU, hon, okay???

Peachy--Mother Superior of the CSH! An honor once held by Cinderella who went more than 5 years! OY VEY!! That's a darn MIRACLE!! Thank you for your encouragement too.

Cinderella--I'm there at the party with you!! I'm bringing truffles and a light champagne with so many bubbles it makes your nose tingle. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Ragamuffin--Can I have that Virginia Slims now? Or do I need to bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan? (old commercials--heehee) I really have come a long way, haven't I? It's amazing to think back on those early days and compare them to now. No, I never wanted a divorce, but here it is and I'm more than okay with it.

Thank you all for your encouragement! I feel so supported here!

CJ