Well my ex had a wonderful weekend with this man she just met two weeks ago. She came back as I would have expected, and stated that she no longer has any interest in working things out with me (RIGHT NOW). She is unsure if this man will call her back or not. So saying all this I'm sure that after a few weeks she will change her mind about me and especially if the other man does not call. I do not want to ride this coaster anymore, but I still love her and would love to get back. If she is truly done how do I let go of all the feelings. It is very tough for me. I need to do it inside of me.

You sound a lot like me - that you have a hard time getting over your feelings. For me, it wasn't "letting go" as it was just changing the focus back on my life. I began playing the guitar again - doing improvements around my house - going out (not looking for anyone, just going out with family and friends). Reading relationship books and other books just for fun....etc...While praying for a miracle.

We were separated for a year before the divorce and I spent that entire time working on myself and doing whatever I could to save the marriage. The day of the divorce it was as-if God had lifted a 100lb weight off my back. Sure I still loved her, but no longer was I trying to save the marriage. Deep in my heart I knew I did EVERYTHING I could to honor my vow to her. It was her decision to go.

As time went by, the feelings of love just slowly faded (along with the pain) to a point where I was just able to wish her well in her life (silently to myself).

so hang in there! Be strong. Do what is in your heart and don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe. If that means standing up for your marriage, then so be it! Just realize that many people will NOT understand and some may even feel "pity" for you, but it isn't between you and them. Be true to yourself and one day when it is over (whether it turns out good or bad), you will feel good about yourself.

God bless,
mike