I'm not sure what to do now, I'm at the end of my rope. My ex has been sending "anonymous" threatening emails. He hasn't paid child support in over 3 months and now this month I can't even pay my rent, car payment, or any other bills. I haven't been able to find more than a part time job that pays $600 a month....it's hard cuz I need child care for 3 kids too.

My dad died 3 months ago, he always helped me, but my mom isn't very sympathetic, says I should find a better job. I'm trying.

Today I got a letter from the bank saying that the mortgage hasn't been paid on the house we owned......my ex was supposed to put it in his name and refinance according to the divorce decree. I guess he didn't.

There's a certified letter waiting for me at the post office, don't know what that is about. Can't be good. I'm getting calls from credit card companies wanting payment, and the utilities are threatening to turn off water and electricity.

I really don't know what to do.....any one have suggestions?

Call the Attorney General and your Lawyer.....You have a dead beat dad on your hands. Its sad that a man would let his kids go to the streets instead of helping them keep a roof over their heads. What a great guy. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

Stop, sit and take a breath. NO matter WHAT, it WILL ALL workout. It will. Have faith in that. Your next thing to do is make a list of all the details you need to address. Don't let the list overwhelm you, just use it to make sure you don't forget anything. List all the creditors and the amounts you owe.

Now come up with a budget of how much it costs for you to "stay alive" with the kids (meals, immediate clothing needs, utilities, the ESSENTIALS). Now figure out how much cash you are making in one month. Is there anything left over after you deduct your expenses from that cash? If so, then make that your debt payment - each month split that amount among your creditors. Call each creditor and explain the situation and explain how much you can afford to pay them. THEY WILL understand. And if you should get a moron on the phone who starts hassling you, ask to speak to their supervisor. Creditors are understanding as long as you communicate with them - it is when you ignore them, that problems start. Even if it is $20 per month, they will see that you are serious about paying off the debt.

As for the credit cards, STOP using them at ALL costs. Use them only for a true emergency (car breaking down).

Finally about the certified letter, just go get it. Don't try to ignore it because it will just weigh you down. The fear is probably much worse than the reality.

Like I wrote in the beginning, everything will workout. Have faith in that. One day at a time and one issue at a time.

God bless,
mike

Thanks.....right now the $6-800 a month I make doesn't quite cover the $1200 a month I need to scrape by. I got really behind cuz new tags on my van were $266.

I use the credit cards for insulin, as I'm diabetic. my medical expenses are $150 a month, fortunately I just became eligible for medicaid, so don't have that right now.

Thanks for all the other tips. Taking in my app for food stamps right now, maybe they'll have some ideas too

May God Bless you and your family!

I'm sure I read the following on here at one point:
Either you worry or you pray, there's no sense in doing both. I suggest prayer. Now I just need to take my own suggestions.

Are you a member of a Church? I know that many Churches have emergency funds for food and stuff... Also, look in the yellow pages of your phone book under 'debt counselors' or something similar - there are many non-profit organizations out there that will sit down with you and help put together a 'budget' to help you get by...

And pray. Pray for what you "need" and have faith your prayers will be answered... (often from the most unlikely sources! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> )
mike

Yes, my church has helped me several times; and are aware of my need now....they will see what they can do to help at their board meeting tomorrow night.

One answer to prayer....I really wanted to get a pool pass for the kids, as we don't have air conditioning. Of course, that's a pretty low priority when you can't pay rent. Well, when I picked the kids up from daycare last week, the manager handed me a family pool pass and said they bought it for us because they didn't want the kids left out when they went to the pool! Is that cool or what?!!!

{{{Anna}}}

Keep your chin up! The previous posts were great suggestions. Definitely call the Child Support people, once your ex is in the system, they WILL get your child support, whether that means taking his assets or not. I've got a dead beat dad for an ex, too.

Lori

Know I am praying. You and I are in the same boat. God will help you. I am here for you.

I am praying right now ok?

Know we love you. Call a consolidator like I did. Lowered cc bills about 275/month and that will be good for settlement.

Pray and pray and pray.

It is dark for us right now but God is here..Our kids love us.

The light is coming soon. Take the man to court asap...

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Annavon:
<strong>One answer to prayer....I really wanted to get a pool pass for the kids, as we don't have air conditioning. Of course, that's a pretty low priority when you can't pay rent. Well, when I picked the kids up from daycare last week, the manager handed me a family pool pass and said they bought it for us because they didn't want the kids left out when they went to the pool! Is that cool or what?!!!</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Very cool... God will take care of you and the children; you just need to let Him do His work and have faith and trust in Him! When you start thinking about all the bad going on right now, try to remember this simple act that meant so much to you, and know that there are more to come!

God bless,
mike

Okay,

Call the electric company, ask them if they have have anyone who works with them for assistance..

I know here, the Salvation Army, and a couple of other places offer assistance..when it's a valid need..

If you haven't called the Salvation Army, do so..
if they don't have the funds available they will call other sources they have..they will ask if you have contacted a church..you can let them know yes, you have contacted YOUR church..they will call them to find out how much they can help with and usually go from there..to help find assistance even if it means calling on other churches..

And your church can also give you a referal to the local food bank..(if they don't have one) to help in that area..so you can put the money you do have towards the bills that need to be paid and not worry about how your going to feed your kids..

I know you pay daycare costs--do you have reduced rates based on your income?? If not, ask them about that..I know here, some daycare centers do that..others don't..so if not..at least ask them about it..if they don't..call around and see if any of the others do..it may help even just a little..

but yes, It will work out...Not always in OUR time frame..but in God's..that is the hardest part
waiting on HIS TIME TABLE!!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by ThornedRose:
<strong>
I know you pay daycare costs--do you have reduced rates based on your income?? If not, ask them about that..I know here, some daycare centers do that..others don't..so if not..at least ask them about it..if they don't..call around and see if any of the others do..it may help even just a little..

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Actually, my day care is paid by the state, if it wasn't I couldn't even afford to work, with 3 kids!

Thank you all for the great suggestions and encouragement, I"m working on it.