If you got divorced in an equitable distribution state, what percentage did the lower-income spouse end up with?

Some people here say the going rate is 65-70%. But I have not been able to tell if that's really true, or how the number is arrived at. Our state divorce code lists a bunch of factors for the judge to consider, but there is no formula or even a guideline, like there is for support.

Thanks,

Tom

HAHAHAHAHA, excuse me while I continue laughing hysterically.

I am in CA, a equitable state and my H, who makes probably $7000/month plus is still having a field day. Every time we made a settlement he would change it and ask for more stuff. I make about $1000/month. I managed to hang on to the house, he used all of his equity to pay his attorney. I just got sanctioned by the judge to make it look like I was "punished" to make him stop being a jerk (sorry, had to go back and change the word I had used, lol) and finish the divorce HE wanted 3 years ago!

Dippy took all the furniture after being gone for over a year and a half, then he wanted more, and he finally made a last list wanting extension cords, the garden hose, vacuum cleaner, etc. Once that was given to him, he emailed me with another list of things he wanted, of which I sent a mental raspberry, lol.

So, I have been redoing a house that while he lived here had no maintenance, had to get furniture, had to pay attorneys off credit cards, etc, etc. Dippy paid over $125,000 to his attorneys and my fees were brought up to about $60,000 by all the depositions and stuff.

There is no justice in divorce court, and if your ex has a sneakier attorney you will be lucky to come out with anything. Just to try and end things, I used values Dippy set on things, gave in on money that he should have owed me, said I made much more income than I do, and on and on. Dippy was just too busy trying to bankrupt/destroy me that he could care less.

Now that things are pretty much final, I let Child Support Services take over on the child support, if it is modified by what is accurate, support should go up from $500 to $1000 per month. I can also take Dippy back to court for contempt as he is still continuing to be as much of a pain as he can be.

Maybe you need an answer from someone who actually went through a somewhat normal divorce, instead of one where ex only wanted to crush and maim?

Lori

Thanks for replying, but I'm sorry about all your tribulations. Especially those attorney fees, wow. You know, with a similar income picture (at the time), I'm paying $3K per month for 3 children plus wife. So I think even $1000 is too low for you. Or did you mean yours will go up by $500-$1000 per month?

I thought CA is a community property state and, in theory, the split is supposed to be 50-50. But there can be hassles over valuation and hidden assets. Is that what happened in your case?

- Tom

I live in Michigan. My X wouldn't settle out of court for 50/50. In court she got less than half of my 401K, very little furniture, I got the house, a Suburban, two snowmobiles, two dogs and almost equal time custody of my twin 10yo daughters. I pay 218 a month CS and make 45% more than her. I still want to get custody changed to a true equal time arrangemant. She wants sole custody. In Michigan sole custody means she could move away, not tell me and there is absolutely nothing I can do. I would completely loose my children. I've always asked for equal time.

sorry Tom, didn't mean to vent on your thread, I actually meant for some people to see how assinine everything becomes in "divorce".

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I thought CA is a community property state and, in theory, the split is supposed to be 50-50. But there can be hassles over valuation and hidden assets. Is that what happened in your case?
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes, and I gave in everytime just to end the thing. The first settlemnt was done on May 29, 2002... the judgement still isn't signed. The only thing I held my ground on was the safety of the girls... I would not let him hurt them anymore; physically, mentally, emotionally, or worse.

Your calculations of support are about right, too. He is currently paying $1557 per month, it shoudl go up another $500 to $1000. He only has .2% custody of one daughter. He has changed everything so that I can't get spousal support, too.