I just have to share this with all of you who are going through heartbreak. This was so comforting to me.

I went to a church revival tonight..and actually I feel the Lord led me there through a series of "coincidences". I heard about the revival on the radio the other day, but I did not know where the church was. Then, today, as I worked in my aunt's steakhouse where I waitress some (I teach school and do this on the off times for extra cash--or just to kill time when XWH has boys), we had a small party (about 15) of people that I happened to wait on. A woman mentioned they were all from this church, and I asked if they were the ones giving the revival. They said yes, and invited me to come. So I made a deal with myself. I decided if I got home and showered and dressed in time to go, I would go. I got off work, went home, showered & dressed, thinking it was probably too late. I had 30 min to get to the place which I estimated was about 20 min away. So I said, Ok Lord, I'm going to go.

I went and had a fabulous time!!! The evangelist preached a sermon on how the Lord was coming "sooner than soon" to heal the broken hearted. That we have to let God handle things in his time, but that He will do it "sooner than soon". He will also take vengeance on wickedness "sooner than soon". And how when we think that things are always going well for the wicked, that God will take vengeance on the wicked in His time. We just have to allow him to do it in His way because our way wouldn't work.

This goes back to what Lupolady was talking about on the "restoration of marriages prayer group" thread, and how we need to surrender our anxieties and worries to God.

It was totally amazing to me that God led me to this worship service as this was exactly what my heart needed.

I hope this post helps anyone out there who may be struggling with their relationships. We really do need to "let go and let God" as it has been said by several posters.

God is great.
Love in Christ,
Kim

hey Kimmie,
thats great I am happy to hear how God worked this out so you could attend, I am praising Him that HE is helping you and holding you close to Him..what a wonderful exciting time for you..

well I am really thinking that you will find rest for yourself and will even feel as though you are being held up on eagles wings..the Lord is before you and behind you and underneath you to gird you and to give you strength..

God bless you and may God continue to do great things in your life..

say a prayer for me..and if you go again ask for prayer for healing of my heart..for it to be restored as it is functioning at 17 % and I am starting to feel different now..and it is scaring me..
thanks..isn't it wonderful to be in HIS presence and you want to stay at church and keep praising don't you..

perhaps you can join the choir..grin..
let me know how long the revival goes on for and where are you what state..I am gonna pin it on my map so we can keep posted of the states we hear are in revival...sleep tight..night <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Sadeyes, I'm from Alabama, and we are having a lot of revival in churches here. I'm going to see how many I can attend, as I haven't been to revival in a long long time (except for the Sat service this weekend).

Yes, I will certainly say a prayer for you. I have incorporated Marriage Builders posters in my prayers, but I'm starting to keep a handwritten prayer list next to the computer so that I may pray for each individually. I have put you on the list and will remember you.

Last night my MIL called (XH and boys were with her this weekend, and he's supposed to keep them next week, too--I'll be so lonely <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> Anyway, she called to tell my my older boy (7) was crying with a stomach ache. She lives about 5 min from me, so I went and got him after talking to him on the phone. Well, I no more than got out of her driveway when he "got sick" all over the back seat of my car. So, we went back to their house and I got him out, took him back up to her house for him (and me, as I was helping him) to get cleaned up and to clean up my car. Well, XH NEVER GOT UP OUT OF HIS CHAIR. Little son (6) was still there eating, and I gave him a kiss (after cleaning up), and MIL was running around trying to help me. I went out and cleaned up my car, and the whole time HE NEVER GOT UP AT ALL. I realized then how lost he has become.

So, although I've come to grips that it is ok for us not to be together anymore (sad, but I"m dealing), I'm going to pray for him because I truly think he is a lost man. I actaully feel sorry for him.

BTW, after staying up most of the night with 7 year old, he's much better, thank the Lord. I guess he'll go back to Dad tonight, and I'll have to deal with seeing him again.

So, please keep me in thoughts and prayers, and I will you too...

It was great to read your post.
I've been listening to a Christian radio station which recently expanded its reach and play alot of music. The kids love Adventures in Odyssey. A daycare teacher told me about it, just when I really needed it.
And, one week later, she won a contest for concert tickets. I told her it was God's way of showing how she'd "enlarged her territory" by sharing this station with others.

You were meant to go to that Revival!

Thanks, Newly, for your post. I'm wondering, though, after reading your signature, what is Narcissitic Personality Disorder? I mean, I've heard of a Narcissistic person, but is there truly a disorder, and if so, what are the symptoms?

XWH is a very handsome man, and always got many compliments on his looks. When we first got together, as teenagers, he wouldn't dwell on these, just to say that he knows looks don't remain, that it's what's inside that counts, and that in 20 years no one would care how he looked (funny, now it's almost 20 years later! ha). Well, the last 3 years of our marriage (He's 34 now) he became obsessed with looks--working out in gym, wanting to look better in clothes (never cared before) etc. Now I know it is because of OW who teaches at the same school as he does, who is also an attractive lady, although 3 years older than he is. Anyway, I always thought H was better looking than me, even though I have had my share of compliments. I'm sure my low self esteem helped enable him to seek out this attractive OW. But, I'm wondering if this narcissism is something he hasn't developed, too. He often thinks that he is always right, and that other people are "stupid" for doing things that they do. He's been that way for a while, too. He also enjoyed the fact that other people would continue to tell him how handsome he was. So, I'm wondering, could he have this, too???

Please reply and tell me what this entails and what are the symtoms. I'm just curious.
Thanks, Kim

<small>[ June 16, 2003, 01:16 PM: Message edited by: kimmy2 ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by SadEyes:
<strong>say a prayer for me..and if you go again ask for prayer for healing of my heart..for it to be restored as it is functioning at 17 % and I am starting to feel different now..and it is scaring me..
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hooooo boy, this describes me to a "T."

I hate to disappoint anyone, (Kimmy) buuuuuuuuut....I am really not doing well lately. Yeah, I KNOW that God is going to handle all this. Yes, I KNOW God has His Hands on the situation. Yes, I KNOW God knows what He's doing, and HE CONTROLS "the heart of the king...."

Surrendering our anxieties and worries to Him. Yeah, riiiiiight. That is SO NOT ME right now!!

Please, please pray for me. I am under attack - big time! I am feeling SOOOOOOOOOOOO down, lied to, sooooooooooooooo hopeless.

I KNOW this is a trick of the evil one. THE FATHER OF LIES. But it's what he's hitting me with right now. It makes me want to believe the breakthrough is right around the corner....but I can't pray through this to reach out to God.

PLEASE, pray for me? <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Sorry, Kimmy, I feel like I'm letting you down. You always compliment me on lifting your spirits up, and I can't even figure out how to pray right now <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Kimmy2---Here is a continuation of your revivial meeting. This proverb is a real thinker for us BS. Proverb 24:17---Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice, or the Lord will see and disapprove and turn His wrath away from him.

How is the e-harmony matchmaking going? Are you still getting responses?

Lupolady and Sadeyes---praying for ya.

TW

Lupolady, trust me, you have NOT let me down. You always say things to keep me in perspective, when I am down. I have found out that these feelings of mine are constantly changing, too. I'll go a couple of weeks thinking I have everything under control, then BAM, I'll have a crying session for "what used to be". I am a worrier, but I always feel much better when I give it to the Lord, and you have SO MUCH helped me to remember to do that over the last couple of weeks. I will add you to my list and say a prayer for you. I have to admit, I haven't been as close to the Lord this spring, I suppose I was trying to handle things on my own, and I've decided again that it doesn't work well that way. So, remember, you have helped a lot of people out here, and I am here if you need to talk. As someone told me today, the feelings we have over this loss isn't a "linear progression". We go two steps forward, one step back----but at least we will eventually get there.

I've decided that I'm going to do some things for myself. I'm joining a divorce support group at a church in a city not far from where I live (I live smack dab in the country), and they also have "line dancing", which I am wanting to learn how to do. Also, I'm going to join a gym and get back into doing aerobics. I have decided on forgetting about having a "mate" for a while and just do things for me and the boys. It has taken some pressure off of me for a while to just focus on the boys and I. I have also decided that I"m going to become a more praying woman. I've decided to look upon my WXH as "lost", and I'm praying for his soul. I'm also praying for the OW, although I do admit that is considerably more difficult than praying for XH. You, Lupolady, have helped me get to this point by your posts on letting God take care of things in His time. We have to trust Him.

TW, I'm not sure what you mean by the e-harmony thing. Maybe you've confused me with another kim? Enlighten me, please. Also, thanks a lot for the verse. It certainly keeps things in perspective. Truly, though, I do not wish bad for XH or OW. I am not going to "rejoice" in their unhappiness should it occur, although I do not feel as if their union will be blessed by God as it tore two families apart. I will be happy if both come to the Lord and repent. I do still love my X, unconditionally it seems, as I've tried to quit loving him. So, I don't want anything bad to happen to him. But adultery (especially between two people who are both married) is a wicked thing. I won't "rejoice" if they have bad times, but I can't say that I won't see the justice in it.

ok lupolady I will be praying for you and kimmie too.
check out my daughters site she is having a revival of her own..and God is annointing her.she has another site focus on jesus and leade bible studys and writes them under inspiration from the Lord..please check her pics here if you want to feel refreshed look at this one it ministers to everyone..I am trying to convince her to write a book and also do calenders with her photos she does..

let your kids view the pictures deer lady bug shedding it's shell..and lots of others..
if you home school you will enjoy these for teaching..too...
she doesn't have tons but she does have quality and eye opening thought provoking things written to go along with each picture..after the first page..
graftmein

I pray that the Lord moves over our country and through our schools and hospitals as well as the churches.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

narcissic personality...wow mine was diagnosed with personality disorder..and I wish he was tested sooner..he had been in a boys school when 15 and 16 went in the navy if he went in the navy he got away with his record was cleaned..
he was a bad..boy and I didn't even know.he was so sweet when I met him..he was always in love with himself.could not say he was sorry..he was always right and no empathy for people at all..but yet he did things for others..that was one thing that confused me..he loved to fix things he got his strokes when we praised him could not get enough of the praises..

there are tons of things I see differnent now..
he didn't take care of me..I took care of him..
he was cruel, I swear he must of laid awake at night thinking of what to do to hurt someone if the did something to offend him even if it was not intentional..oh I will see if I can find the list of symptoms...he is a Hyde and Jeckle personality..a camelon...I am trying to forget my husband as I don't have too many good thought of him right now..soooooo...
maybe if we listen to God...we would not get bogged down, I know it to be true..but..sometimes it is hard to pray for ourselves..and we need to hold out brothers and sisters arms up in prayer..
comfort..them..

well lets do what God says..
and
think on whatsoever things are lovely, true and a good report..not the bad things that pull us down..
but the things of God..the pure things..

I will also pray for your son kimmie
david wilkerson has alot of good sermons on depression and oppression and also the end times and how satan is not going to let us christians take it easy who have taken Christ as our saviour he is going to turn on us and TRY TO DEVOUR US..
but that means try..he is not allowed he can try, so I figure thats where the attacks on our marriages and through the porno and we need to be strong in the Lord..and not give a foothold to the father of lies..the deceiver..the snake that is laying in wait for us in the grass..we need to keep reading Gods word because it is our weapon against him..slewfoot has no power over us..
We are already in Christ..covered by the blood of Jesus..if I go on here I am gonna do a sermon..and then do a come to Jesus..lol.
but will be praying that God will strengthen us all in our inner man:) Amen.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

think about this how fun it would be to get together to praise God, to worship Him together, to put all differences aside for 6 hours and concentrate only on HIM..
can you imagine what might happen??WOW? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Sorry Kimmy2, I did get you confused with KK2002. Not sure why cause your handles are very different.

www.eharmony.com is a Chritian matchmaking website that I suggested to KK2002. I did get you two mixed up.

TW

I didn't check your thread for a while. NPD is not so much about looks as actions. Below is from a site someone on MB had bookmarked.

Translation: Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a pattern of self-centered or egotistical behavior that shows up in thinking and behavior in a lot of different situations and activities. People with NPD won't (or can't) change their behavior even when it causes problems at work or when other people complain about the way they act, or when their behavior causes a lot of emotional distress to others (or themselves? none of my narcissists ever admit to being distressed by their own behavior -- they always blame other people for any problems). This pattern of self-centered or egotistical behavior is not caused by current drug or alcohol use, head injury, acute psychotic episodes, or any other illness, but has been going on steadily at least since adolescence or early adulthood.
NPD interferes with people's functioning in their occupations and in their relationships:
Mild impairment when self-centered or egotistical behavior results in occasional minor problems, but the person is generally doing pretty well.
Moderate impairment when self-centered or egotistical behavior results in: (a) missing days from work, household duties, or school, (b) significant performance problems as a wage-earner, homemaker, or student, (c) frequently avoiding or alienating friends, (d) significant risk of harming self or others (frequent suicidal preoccupation; often neglecting family, or frequently abusing others or committing criminal acts).
Severe impairment when self-centered or egotistical behavior results in: (a) staying in bed all day, (b) totally alienating all friends and family, (c) severe risk of harming self or others (failing to maintain personal hygiene; persistent danger of suicide, abuse, or crime).