I just kind of ran across this one. Maybe its been posted here before and I misssed it. Has anyone ever tried it?

http://www.stopyourdivorce.com/125.htm

I've tried this stuff. The ideas are all the same and it's rather expensive I think. Basically they tell you to become a better and different person. A person who your WS would want to be with. A person who has their act together and mystery in their life. They tell you to be nice to your WS and help her pack her stuff if she wants to move out. It is important not to look emotionally devistated by your WS's action. You must look and come across as a stable person not a weak person who appeases and begs and crys. They tell you to really get your life in order and focus on yourself and your needs. Alot of this is good stuff but it is a theory that is generally well know and much of this stuff is practiced right here on these forums. Hope this helps.

Hopeful
I agree with Joquin. I have visited that site and printed out the examples, which are free by the way. If you haven't read them, I suggest you go all the way to the bottom and click on examples and read all of them.

I did this because on another website, a woman said she had bought the book, but found that most of the same information was in the free examples.

One thing I like that he says is that you need to get it clear in your head that getting your WS back is a desire and not a need. There is a big difference, and when you are able to understand and make a plan with that understanding you will not be so clingy and desperate and will become more attractive to your WS. Honestly, no one really wants a needy person, even if they are the cause of that. I thought that made good sense to me. He also tells you to stop obsessing about the WS and concentrate on yourself. Also great information, but hard to follow when you feel like your world is falling apart and the one person you need wants nothing to do with you.
I did not find MB's or that site until many months after my WH moved out. It has been difficult for me to implement many plans because of it, but i am determined.
The other point he makes on the Stop web book is that you need to understand that your WS will not be attracted to you unless you become someone that would be attractive to others - not just physical, but interesting, fun, active, loving and caring, etc. It is a hard pill to swallow. But after many months of soul searching I could see in myself that I had let my WH down by not being the best I could be, so that is what I focus on now and will continue to do until his A has ended and I will be an attractive choice for him. That's my decision. I realize not everyone can make the same one. Hope this helps you decide whether to buy or not.
God Bless you.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by cajeanie:
<strong> your WS will not be attracted to you unless you become someone that would be attractive to others. I could see in myself that I had let my WH down by not being the best I could be.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, gonna jump in here, then DUCK for cover!

I posed this ? 2 yrs ago, and never really understood the answers I got. Soooooo, here I am 2 yrs later, now div'd (wasn't 2 yrs ago, only separated) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> still don't know what "stategy" fits my situation.

The ? is this: What do you do when you WERE the "self-confident, independent woman" you KNEW H wanted you to be. He TOLD ME he knew I'd be OK after he left, cause I could "take care of myself."

Absolutely NOTHING I could do to "show him" an independent person, cuase HE KNEW that part of me!! Was I needy? Clingy? Begging? Weak? NEVER!!!!

And he knew it. And he knew I'd be able to stand on my own 2 feet (or at least LAND back on them after the blows he'd thrown me). Soooooooo, NO NEED for changes in that area!

I am rambling. Let's see if I can sum up.

H KNEW I was independent, confident, capable, NOT clingy, wouldn't beg (although I came close at the first, and it almost got through the fog), cried - but he hated to hear it, since I NEVER did it all during our M.....couldn't stop the first few months he left, and he never wanted to hear it when we talked, it made him mad. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

So there you have. H was proud of my independence.....all our M'd life. He not only thrived on it, he needed it, and LEANED on it! There is NOTHING I can "change" that will be "attractive" to H. In fact, he wouldn't know if anything changed at all. H NEVER LOOKED BACK. Not once. Period. Talk about a "hopeless-looking" situation.

This is why I know only God can put this back together.

Help me out here, friends.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by lupolady:
<strong>

I posed this ? 2 yrs ago, and never really understood the answers I got. Soooooo, here I am 2 yrs later, now div'd (wasn't 2 yrs ago, only separated) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> still don't know what "stategy" fits my situation.
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">It sounds to me, by still mentioning "strategy" after all this time, that you don't think that your relationship with your H is over with.

It's actually kind of good to see that someone else is looking at it that way. I'm going through the whole divorce process right now. W has been served, but I don't know how she is going to respond. She had 35 days and is halfway through that period now.

I don't think there are any simple answers. One can follow all the MB principles to the letter. But there are no guarantees. I know I had to take this step for me and my daughters. But it doesn't mean I wanted to. I'd stop the whole process if my W would just agree to counseling...

Always Hope,

I love your name because it says what I have learned on my journey, there is always hope. That is as long as your hope is in God.

I didn't want a divorce when my husband left. I found hope at a restoration web site. My husband left three years ago and filed for divorce. God lead me to a marriage restoration site and I started following HIs principles that were shown to me thru His word. I am still not divorced, and I know it is GOd.

We are getting along better than ever now and he is even telling my friends he is thinking about coming home. I know he will be home soon. It all happened because I let God change me and because I put al my faith in Him not the world.

Here is the site I went to www.restorem.org

I believe that GOd's plan is the only plan that works for good. I had trouble understanding GOd's plan for marriage and this site helped me understand what God's word says about marriage.

There are some other good site also. Keep your hope.

gentle

Just to clarify, I'm not advocating the ideas on StopDv site. I was just trying to sum them up.
I feel your money would be much better spent on the books and tapes at the restoremarriage site.
That's mho,but only you know what is best for you.

lady,
we meet again. I always defer to you. I have learned much from your posts and your encouragement to others. I don't have any answers, I'm just asking God to reveal to me what He wants me to do as I go along, and He has certainly been faithful to do that.

gentle,
Praise God. Please keep posting the restore address. It took me several times of seeing it to finally go there.