I have posted here before regarding my relationship with my common-law husband of seven years. We have been having problems for quite some time now. I have been unhappy with him for the last 3 years because I feel like he hasn't been there for me. I was involved with someone else this year who I fell very much in love with, but ended because I didn't feel that it was right to leave my husband. We have a 6 year old son together. I have not been in touch with this other man at all in quite some time now. I have been under a lot of stress lately--my father is having chemo/radiation for cancer, my sister just had open heart surgery this week, we are having money problems, and we are not having sex and haven't in quite a while. I just don't have the desire to at all right now and he was very upset with me while we were at my sister's home because I would not give in. It just wasn't the time or place at all. I even tried to reassure him that it was not because of the other man that I was involved with (BUT I did not have any sexual contact with this man at all; only companionship). So he is upset with me. Our personal problems stemmed from him being out drinking most of the time instead of being there when I needed him. I am a very emotional person and have had a lot to deal with and he just hasn't been there for me. I must say that he has now, but many times before, he never was. A month ago, his truck broke down and he called to say that he would be a little late for our son's baseball game. Well, he finally got the truck running with the help of our brother-n-law, but they decided to go in the local pool hall and have a drink or two instead. He didn't know that I knew this, but I questioned him in a round-a-bout way several times. He swore and pleaded over and over again that it wasn't true and I could even ask the brother-n-law. He calls him behind my back and talks about it and only for me to hear him say that what I don't know won't hurt me. I feel like there is no trust left in this relationship at all. He hasn't lied about really bad things that I know of. But he doesn't see the point. It's the fact that he has been dishonest with me after promising to never let me down again after the way he has for the last 3 years. How can he say he loves me? I think it's just habit and stability for us anymore. Someone please advise.

My mom is in the same kind of relationship as you. She is with a man and they are living common-law. They have two children together but are completely miserable. They only stay together because of the children. She always says she wants to leave but never does. Here's what I think...don't stay with someone just because of your son. Ask yourself am I truly happy? Would I marry this man and spend my whole life with him? If you have a million doubts, you probably shouldn't stay in the relationship. You shouldn't feel guilty about leaving because you guys are only common law. You didn't actually say your vows. If you are truly unhappy I think you should move on. If you love the man you should have a long talk with him about his dishonesty and let him know how you feel. You should try to work things out. Do what makes you happy. Don't stay in the relationship if it's only for convenience. Well, I wish you luck...