...to communicate. I finally caved on my no contact policy with the WW and wrote her an email explaining my stance on how stupid her lawyer is and why I'm not overtly cooperating. It took SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long... because I had to keep deleting caustic remarks.

Those crazy caustic remarks. And, btw, I crossed the 1year D-Day anniversary with only minor histrionics on my part. <weeeee......!>

I finally caved on my no contact policy with the WW and wrote her an email explaining my stance on how stupid her lawyer is and why I'm not overtly cooperating. It took SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long... because I had to keep deleting caustic remarks.

I'm not familiar with your situation but would like to know more. What exactly has her lawyer done to you and why are you not cooperating? What were some of the caustic remarks? Hope you are doing well.

Jo
-------------------------------------------------
Me BS 51
WW 47
married 24 years
Son 22, Daughter 20
D-Day #1 1980
D-Day #2 1981
D-Day #3 1987
D-Day #4 April 2003
Plan B 6/1/03
Asked WS to move out
Loosing patience and love.
Getting close to filing for D.

<small>[ June 18, 2003, 03:20 PM: Message edited by: Joquin1 ]</small>

L,
You are stronger than you think you are. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
I have faith that you will overcome your anger at your WW.
Life is not always so unfair.

your friend,
Aly

Thanks Aly.

It's one of those times where things just seem to be really piling up. And after almost 8 weeks, I think, of no contact, I start getting phone calls and emails that sound soooooo sweet and gentle all leading up to "Will you sign the dv papers?" She's so manipulative that way.

Here's an example from a recent email:
- "I forgive you for wanting this divorce. I really did want to work it out and love you alone for the rest of my life. I however could not forgive myself for the hurt I caused you in my extreme stupidity. How could I possibly expect you to forgive me of something I don't think I could forgive you of."

If you don't know her, you read this and think... wow, maybe the fog is lifting.

Hi Lyxa,

Amazing how the e-mail begins "I forgive you for wanting the divorce."

Sounds like to me if she wants you to sign, she
is the one wanting the divorce!!

So I don't think the fog has lifted yet, and
she is still manipulative.

Good thing you caught on to that!!

-Ladysheep

L,
It sounds to me that you haven't given up on her. You seem to still have hope for the two of you.

Who has the fog again? You or her?

your friend,

Aly

Just in case there's any confusion in this post...
- She's being manipulative.
- I'm not letting myself be manipulated.

However, I am very dissappointed. It would be nice if just once in this whole mess, one of her apologies didn't coincide with something she wanted from me. And, in a beautiful, best case scenario, there would be sincere and true recognition on her part that would lead to repentance with God. Even were that the case, I would not get back together with her. You can't have a relationship with someone where there is no love, trust, respect. Even if a miracle happened and she found these things for me again (isn't it weird how they lose trust for you when they're off having affairs?), these are losses already cut and will not be reciprocated beyond a modicum of respect for her finally getting a clue.

<small>[ June 21, 2003, 08:29 PM: Message edited by: Lyxa ]</small>