i was told this morning that my father is getting married again. I really want to be madly happy for him, heis my hero. The only problem is that this is the woman he had an affair woth 6 years ago, that ended my parents 30 yr marriage. Even now, my mom has a great man in her life and my dads fiance is loved bye most everyone, it is stressful to get any family things done, parties, weddings, graduation, without there being a fight betweeen them. It tears us all up. i have to confess that i still see her as the OW at times and i try not to. When will it feel okay again??? allof us kids are over 25 years old and just want peace in this!!!!!<BR>Maine

Hi Maine, we all make life choices and more times than not, they affect others in our lives. Just the idea the woman your father is marrying is/was the OW, is staggering enough, however, as an adult, you need to make a choice; either accept her and be happy for your father or not accept her and move on with your life. But never close your heart to your father. There will come a day when your father will need you or vice versa and you will want that bridge in good condition. :-) In any case, love your father enough to be cordial to his fiance' if for no other reason, but to show your father he raised a wonderful adult child he can be proud of. Remember, your behavior is your responsibility. <BR>Is your mother ok with all this? Does she make comments that may be affecting your thought patterns regarding your father's fiance'? <BR>Whatever the case, be the best person you know to be and then be better. :-)

my mother has not been told yet!! I really like Dads soon to be wife it is my brother that does not<BR>Maine<P>------------------<BR>IN the words of BOB the BUILDER!!" WE can fix it, yes we can!!!"

Hi Maine, I take it, you are feeling the entire burden for this situation, because your mother doesn't know and your brother isn't happy?<BR>If this is the case, tell your mother and let your brother read my previous post. ;-)

Will do, My dad is telling my mom tomorrow YIKES, In time it will heal I HOPE lol Thanks for the advice<BR>Maine<P>------------------<BR>IN the words of BOB the BUILDER!!" WE can fix it, yes we can!!!"