I really feel like I am just stuck in this bad moment of time and things just aren't looking up for me. The divorce is proceeding and soon within say about four weeks or so it should be all taken care of. I am moving forward from my WS in my life. I tried and I can look back and say I did everything I could. The part that bothers me now is when I wake up in the morning I feel as if I have nothing to look forward to. Another day just like yesterday and it was just blah. I am trying to create happiness in my life but it just seems like there is a big piece of the puzzle missing. My luck over the past two years has just been awful and I am wondering when my luck will finally start looking up for me. This year alone I am dealing with the divorce, broke my right toe back in March, broke my left hand at the end of June. I just can't seem to catch a break for the world. I feel I try to hard to find those answers on what will make me happy and I think that is because I want out of this moment in my life and I want to be in a better place where I am happy. I am just spinning my wheels and I am sitting still....I look at people in their cars and wonder are they happier than me? Do they have a significant other to go home to, etc... Do you ever feel like life is standing still for you and everyone is passing you by and you are like hey what about me? All this has been so far along that people aren't going to have that sorrow for me any more because of how long it has been. It has been a long time since this all has been started and I just can't seem to find out why I can't be happy. I go through some small moments where I am happy but I find myself just being like there. I do try to keep busy. I haven't been able to work out since I broke my left hand but I still run, etc. When most people are looking forward to getting up in the morning I am like oh no not another day. I don't look forward to work and I am just unmotivated. At night I don't want to go to sleep because I don't want to wake up the next day and face the same thing as the day before. I even tell myself it has to get better but it just doesn't seem like it is. Does anyone else feel this way? Is this normal?

confused_guy, I don't really know what's normal, but I relate to your feelings. Sometimes I still feel very blah, even when things are going well. Now that I'm alone I could do whatever I want to do, but even at almost 52, I haven't figured out what that is... So, I go to work, visit with friends, go to Al-Anon, therapy, church, etc.

My H and I were together, for better or worse, for almost 20 years. I think it takes longer to recover fully than we would like. If I look at the bright side, I have a lot to be grateful for and my life is generally pleasant without the horrible ups and downs of a few years ago. Joy is fleeting though and I still sometimes drift off into sad memories and regrets about the past. I try to focus on the improvement, even though I might not yet be where I wish I was.

And what's with the broken bones? I broke my ankle last Fall (my horse fell on me) - it required surgery and everything. I've never broken anything worse than a toe before...

So are we "normal"? At least we're not alone.

Confused----our battle with infidelity has been kind of on the same time-line. This separating/detaching is a lengthy process and you have to realize that you have a hole in your heart the size of California. It takes the "breath" out of you to say the least.

I must say that I feel I have had a breakthrough a couple of weeks ago. I was so heavy and maybe somewhat depressed. I could not imagine being able to stand the heartache much longer. I was also feeling so quilty cause my life is so good right now and God has helped with everything. Never thought I would be able to survive financially living alone. I was weeping and "wailing" one night to God and told Him he had to fill the hole in my heart cause I could not stand it much longer. I told him I was sorry for feeling so ungrateful and I want to be content no matter how I was living. I asked Him to change my attitudes and get me out of the living for what could be......

He DID!!!! Then I woke up the next morning and my devotional was in Ecclesiastes. There is something to read if you are a Bible reader. I read it in the Contemporary English Version and it was really hitting home alot. Everything is chasing the wind----money, 1,000 wives, power, wisdom, etc-----The ending few verses sums up life. Oh well--it helped me.

Point is---we need to move on but sometimes we can't without God's help and God's perspective on things. Why we have to ask God specificaly for help, I don't know but He is a powerful God.

Praying for your heavy, broken (((((heart)))))),
TW

Being divorced has nothing to do with those feelings.

I am married with child and I still feel the same way. I am almost 40 and I feel as if my youth is gone. I shouldn't complain; I have a wife that I can trust and rely on, I have a beautiful daughter, I have a good job, I have a decent home, and I can afford to do what I want when I want.
But I am still unhappy. I say to myself "Is this it? Isn't there more to life than this?"
I don't know what I want.................

Sometimes with our finite knowledge and wisdom we forget that everything is according to God's plan. As much as my situation sucks, I know God has a plan, he's building me up and making me a better person regardless and I thank him for everything he has done, is doing and will do in the future.

A lot of peole go through life wondering if there is more to life, why they are never satisfied with things and I think it is Spiritual fulfillment they are lacking. Knowing there IS something greater in the world and something to look forward to after death is very appeasing.

Sounds like depression. Maybe just a few months on an antidepressant will make you feel better. It's not an embarressing thing its a physical thing that happens to people during great stress. When I went through my divorce I was on prozac for 4 months. It was all I needed to get my strength back and my zest for life.

Just a thought.

PS I am in the medical field and I see this alot so i do know some of what I am talking about. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Jill

Sounds stress related --- like maybe you just need to find a different way of dealing with the realities that are your life.

some days I feel so totally overwhelmed that I just can't keep my eyes on my target - and other days, I feel in control... Neither day is optimal. Actually, the best days are those when my target just seems to be in front of me all day - without my control... Those days tend to happen when I'm not trying to control my issues.

When I get my priorities straight - I feel more optimistic, and less overwhelmed. I believe it is necessary to find our own focus in life and keep it central - even if things are all out of whack.

For me - that focus is God. If you can focus on God, all the rest will fall into place... That doesn't mean you won't break your arm, or have a wreck, or even ruin a perfect relationship, but those things will be in better perspective with God in focus.

Blessings,

Jan

For myself I still am seaking out those answers of why I am not happy. I want to figure out what will make me happy. I am not sure if it is being depressed or not. I think part of why I am so down is I question why there isn't someone in my life now who appreciates me for who I am. It makes you question yourself when you think why does that other person have a girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband, etc.. and I don't. I know it is stupid thinking that but nobody really likes being alone. Maybe one day I will find another person to be in my life. Right now I am just taking life as it comes to me and I am not out there pushing to find or meet a hundred different woman. However I still find myself to be very down as if in some ways life has rejected me from anything good happening in my life.....

You have to make yourself happy, finding a mate isn't going to instantly make you happy.

I still talk to one of my ex girlfriend's and she goes thru one bad relationship after another. She hates being alone so she puts up with alot of garbage from all these idiots; she is searching for something that isn't out there.
All she wants is to find the right man, get married and she thinks that will make life wonderful.
It don't work that way; you have to be happy yourself to give and receive happiness from others.