I was just wondering how many bs have had their ws turn the trust issue around onto them? My stbx had 3 EA with the final one I believe becomming a SA after he moved out out the home and now tries to tell me I can't be trusted! Suddenly I am the person who is at fault and I am untrustworthy. I was just wondering if this is a common practice for spouses to try and project their immoral ways and values onto the bs to somehow make themselves feel better?

I was just telling a friend of mine the other day how he makes me feel guilty for almost every thing I do whether it involves the children or other decisions I make on my own. He tries to tell me I can't make certain decisions regarding our children without his approval even though I have custody of them and even though I try and talk to him about those decisions, tells me how he has to check up on me because I don't give him all the information I should give him. For a while I started to believe I was guilty when my friend said I didnt' have to explain myself because he is just trying to mess with my head.

Do other WS sometimes try and make the bs feel this way? I feel like he is trying to make me crazy or nuts or something which he tried to do pretty much to me throughout or marriage. What I mean by that, and I know most of you can probably relate to this, he used to tell me I was crazy when I would find emails between him and his OW that would be suggestive. He would say I was reading into it because i was jealous. Or he would say that his females friends were just friends and I had a problem with it and needed help...but of course I would always discover they were not "just friends."

I was just wondering if anybody had been through this kind of thing or is going through this kind of thing now? Oh and by the way, I have had to change my username on here about 5 or 6 times because he would come here to read the posts to see if I had been posting so that he could harass me about the things that I would say. I try to keep identifying remarks out of my posts to prevent this from continuing to happen because this site really helps me grow and learn.

CH

Yes, I was and to some extent in the same shoes as you are. Will post later. Have to see a spinal specialist for an injury my x-husband did to me. Since you have been here for awhile, you will recognize me and my x-husband when I come back.