H has been in withdrawal for I don’t know how long, we’re living separately and about two steps away from the big D. He wants it, I don’t, nothing legal yet. Not even legally separated. We where spending a lot of time together for about 2-3 weeks up until a week ago. Good times, no LBing what so ever – on my part. Than one day he just got mad and said people should treat people the way they’re supposed to be treated in the beginning not wait until they’re well runs dry and than try to be nice. And than I found out about OW. Since than, he has done nothing but try to hurt me. Like not paying CS than lying and saying I sent people to attack and rob him. He accused me of sending these attackers, but he didn’t not once call me a bit—I guess that’s a step in the right direction.
My theory, is that he is intentionally hurting me as part of his withdrawal. I know that he’s probably surprised that I haven’t proceeded against him in anyway i.e. legal actions, arguments, I haven’t done anything to further alienate him, other than calling the OW, that one time. Even after finding out about her, in more detail and being faced to face with him. I didn’t cry and jump up and down like a fool. I haven’t harassed either of them in any way. It seems that he is just randomly pushing my buttons waiting for me to drop the bomb on him. And I won’t. I wonder if it’s pissing him off?
He needs to push my buttons because he needs me to respond in an irrational manner, so that I can cosign his theory of me being an evil woman, and he can continue to stack the chips of hate against me. Every little nice peaceful thing I do makes him vulnerable. If he can get me to engage in this warfare he can continue to stack the hate chips so high, that there is no turning back and he will never have to be vulnerable to me again. There may already be no turning back. But if he wants a D why not just go fill out the paperwork. What is the point of stacking the chips
