Well, after several days of legal wrangling last week and another flury of nasty lawyer to lawyer letters, my WW and her attny did not effect any change...now, she is talking settlment...However, the settlement is not in my best interest or that of my children...basically, she wants the Fl hse and she will let me have the De hse and the two older children...we would settle finances later...welll the only hitch, is she cannot afford the hse in Fl nor can I...I would be w / out a job and no car and can not get in the De hse currently because we have a tennent...Plus..I could not get an apartment because I would be unemployed...not to mention two kids w/ needs...I do not see me being in a very strategic position...In fact, I would risk being unemplyed for a period and then lose all the children...My W had a wake-up call from her attny that to continue this fight would be another 10K...neither of us have that avail...to add insult to injury, I found out today that she has now just about maxed out our credit card...she is living w/ friends due to the NC spousal abuse arrest..She has a court appearance tomorrow am and the State is not going to back down...so, all in all I see me being in a good position while she continues to spiral out of control...she will soon be out of money, not sure where she will live and may risk losing all three children..we will likely be filing bankruptcy in 6 months...many lives wrecked and resources lost...all for what...all for a fantasy and she still has not faced her own issues of duplicity ....I am standing strong and faithful that whether our marriage is salvaged or not, it will be from the will of God and strangely, I have a peace about it all...Pray for us all and stay tuned...

Hello Amazing,

I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Might I suggest that you do not agree to anything that you think is not in your and your childrens' best interest. Let your wife implode from her decisions. It sounds harsh but a number of people have to reach rock bottom before they can lift themselves up. Best to not let her drag you down. Might I suggest that you come up with a reasonable counter offer. Think long and hard with what you want and what you are willing to give her.

Am I correct in thinking that you have full custody of the children? If that is the case you have a right to the home that they live in. Also make sure you are not responsable for all debts she is currently incurring during the separation.

My thoughts are that you show a decent counter offer to her offer and than hold firm. She is crashing at a steller speed just let them know that at this rate you could end up with everything anyways take the offer or leave it. Than whoever flinches first looses. Talk it over with your lawyer but maybe it is time for the hardball to come out and play.