Jill and Starting Over, I hope you will also comment on my comments re: the belief that dating and remarriage equates to happiness and wholeness.

Love My EX,
To be honest with you I feel I have said all I'm going to say on this subject. I feel like I am beating a dead horse here. I will say that no, I am certainly not angry with God. I just have my own beliefs and no bible thumping, scripture throwing is going to change me. I have tried to live a very good, honest life. I have spent my entire adult life helping the elderly. I have been a good Mother and I was a good wife. It was my EX who chose to end our union. I am happy now with my Fiance and I will not apologize for it!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

I still disagree........If a person leaves thier spouse, lives with them, has multiple partners, doenst want to reconcile with thier spouse.....there is NO MARRIAGE. How can it be a marriage? The vows were broken. That is NOT marriage.

<small>[ September 11, 2003, 08:52 AM: Message edited by: StartinOver ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by LoveMyEx:
<strong>Jill and Starting Over, I hope you will also comment on my comments re: the belief that dating and remarriage equates to happiness and wholeness.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">It depends on whom you remarry. I had planned on staying single for as long as necessary and/or perhaps forever. I became friends with a woman and we just so happen to be great together. Im sorry you feel that since your first marriage didnt pan out......that its necessary to feel all relationships afterwards are doomed. That is so sad.

Thank you LoveMyEx for your words of wisdom, and quite obviously the Holy Spirit's input. I'm not sure what tomorrow will bring, perhaps the Lord may decide I am to be single for the rest of my life to serve Him more fully, perhaps not. Whatever it is to be I am okay with that. Its great to have a loving spouse, as it is great to be available full time for the Lord.

As far as the law still considering me married, my question is if that is really true, then why does the law only consider it adultery when you are still under the same roof. Aparently, once you move out you are considered separated, and your spouse is not committing adultery, hmmmm?

Anyways, Christ is my life, and if the Holy Spirit convicts me that I need to end my relationship, then I will. As of this moment, I do not sense that.

Blessings to everyone!

PS. Happiness and wholeness should never come from or be based on your circumstances, nor should it eminate from the person you are with, nor should it be lacking if you are single. Happiness and wholeness should come from your relationship with Jesus Christ as your Lord, Saviour, and your life. Afterall, the scriptures say we are the righteousness of God 11Cor 5:21, as well as a whole host of other scriptures that talk about who we are in Christ, which I would be more than willing to post if anyone would like.

Blessings again!

Niceguy…

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes Chris, the scriptures presented here are weighing heavily on my conscious right about now.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I’m really glad you’ve seem to have taken a look at the scripture provided.

But if you don’t mind, I’d like to ask you again; “have you discussed these scriptures with your GF?” She is still a child of God needing to deal with this situation along with you. If you have, then I would have nothing more to say. Keep growing and striving to understand the heart of God. Bless you.

S&C

Jill,

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That is what makes us different from the apes we have the ability to think and reason and choose our own way of interpeting what the bible says.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If I didn’t believe you were a Christian, then I could easily interpret this as you telling me that I don’t use my brain and therefore nothing more than a primate.

Very insulting if; I chose to interpret it that way. But I do my best not to let the enemy try confuse me into thinking that a Christian would purposely say things to offend me.

Personally I do use my brain. I read scripture, see what says; pray on it and ask the Holy Spirit to help me to understand it. Sometimes it shows me I am in error of my current beliefs and that doesn’t feel good. If that is the case, then I need to ask God to help me change in that area. Kind of like when a doctor resets a bone after it is broken; it hurts to reset it, but it will heal properly. If it isn’t reset just to avoid the initial pain, then the healing that might take place isn’t really healing at all. I use my brain to tell me that God’s instruction will never harm me. It might make me uncomfortable and ask me to do things that are hard for me to do, but it would never harm me.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I just have my own beliefs and no bible thumping, scripture throwing is going to change me.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">2 Timothy 3:16-17 16All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It straightens us out and teaches us to do what is right. 17It is God's way of preparing us in every way, fully equipped for every good thing God wants us to do.

If this offends you then I’m sorry, just remember I didn’t write it. Please be careful.

Prayers and blessing to you.

S&C

Dear Steadfast and Committed, no I have not discussed thses scriptures with my girlfriend, nor have I said anything to her as of yet about writing here on MB. Maybe I should? I'm thinking about it.

Thanks!

Steadfast that is good for you. I have my way of believing and you have yours.

? Do you do things for others?? Volunteer your time?? God looks at those things to.

ps,

No I did not imply you do not use your brain. You are not even understanding what I was saying.

What I was trying to get across is God gave us all the ability to think and reason and make our own choices. You have made your choice to follow the scripture word for word and that is good its your choice its not everyones.

jill,

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No I did not imply you do not use your brain. You are not even understanding what I was saying.

What I was trying to get across is God gave us all the ability to think and reason and make our own choices. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I really did kow what you meant. If you had really read mine, you would have also read that "if I chose" to look at it from a curtain point of view, I could have thought you meant; I don't use my brain and therefore a primate.

I knew you didn't mean that. I chose to look at it from the perspective that you were a Christian and would not say anything to intentionally insult me or hurt may feelings. I chose to understand it to mean you used you're brain and try to understand the bible intellectually; then apply it logically. Did I understand you correctly or am I still off base?

BTW Yes I do have works to show my faith. I help give shelter, food and clothes to homeless and less fortunate people. But it is only a by-product of my faith in God and nothing more.

Later'z.

S&C

Steadfast,

? who is the enemy? Me? Someone who does not believe as you do. To me that classifies as a individual?? What if I were to tell you I was not a Christian but an athiest. Would that make me your enemy?
I do not feel I have been negative to you but i sure have had some pretty bashing comments from you. I was just trying to get my point across. I was not criticizing your beliefs but i sure feel that you have been putting me down. It is treating people in that pias (sp) way that has driven people out of the church.

___________________

The line is drawn lets leave it at that

Starting Over, no offense at all, but I don't understand why a happily remarried man is coming to the divorced forum?? I'm sure there is a good reason.

<small>[ September 12, 2003, 03:42 AM: Message edited by: LoveMyEx ]</small>

I come here to help those who have just been divorce or going through one......I guess thats against MB rules. I will go to the happily married couple forum........ <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

I browse all the open forums........I come to MB to help with my new marriage actually. It has really helped me in alot of ways. I see what women desire from their spouse and see the things that men do NOT do to nurture their marriages. Its therapeutic to me. Have a good day. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

jill,

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">? who is the enemy? Me? Someone who does not believe as you do.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">The enemy is Satan. He is the author of confusion and lies, not you.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What if I were to tell you I was not a Christian but an athiest.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Then we wouldn't be having this discussion at all.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Would that make me your enemy?</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Again, you are not my enemy.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I do not feel I have been negative to you</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No you have not been negitive in any way, but you have obviously been misunderstanding what I have been writing.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">but i sure have had some pretty bashing comments from you.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What did I say this time that makes you think I was bashing you? I really want to know.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">i sure feel that you have been putting me down.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Please, please help me understand what I said. It does seem that for some reason, no matter what I write, you will look for something negetive in it. All I have tried to do is understand by either asking you questions or making clarifying statements and ask if I was correct. If I'm not correct then tell me and clarify it for me.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">It is treating people in that pias (sp) way that has driven people out of the church.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Jill, if I have come across to you as pious I'm truely very sorry. I sincerly ask for you to let me know what I wrote that made you feel I was like that. Please accept my apologies.

I do not like arguing with another Christian over God's word or anything else. I just tried to point out that it is easy to read things into words. And Satan (the enemy) is always around to help Christians take our eyes off of our Lord (this includes me too). Everyone is capable of being decieved by Satan.

So please forgive me for everything I said that made you feel like I was putting you down or slamming your beliefs. I truly am very sorry.

Love in Christ.

S&C

StartingOver,

I have often wondered 'cause there are a few in the "divorced" thread who are remarried, so I have wondered before why they were in this particular divorce thread. A question... again, not in a defensive manner, but probably more of the "counselor" coming out in me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Have you forgiven your first wife? I mean truly forgiven.

Steadfast, yes, Satan is THE enemy! He is the one who lies, deceives, and portrays himself as our "friend." That is why truth spoken in love is so important. The truth (Word of God) is one of our spiritual weapons in the battle we wage with our enemy. Satan makes evil look "good" and good look "evil." He says that what is wrong is right and what is right is wrong. Even though I am a strong Christian of many years, when I am not consistently studying the Word, I find my own self being deceived! God's Word is truly the "lamp unto my feet" and the "light unto my path."

God bless!