My wife and I have been married for about a year and a half. Recently, she underwent some treatment for depression and other things. She was in the hospital for about a week. Everyday I went in and saw her, for as long as I could stay. Our marraige was pretty rough before she went in, but it was my assumption that it was this sickness that contributed mostly to the failure of the relationship. Now she's moved to another state, has been there for about a month. She's staying with family. We were going to both move down there, but now... She recently came home on her way to a show. We didn't really have a chance to talk as she was busy getting things ready and such. She did go to her doctor's and upon returning home told me that she didn't want me to move down with her just yet. Stated that she didn't know what she wanted right now and that she didn't want me to move and then her tell me that she wanted a divorce. I've talked to her several times since then.. all with about the same result. She said she needs time to help herself, which is what I'm guessing this "doctor" told her to do. My problem is that if we are a true couple shouldn't BOTH of us work on this? Her leaving me like this has left so many things unanswered in my mind. I'm almost wondering if she isn't having an affair. I know her condition is real, and that she does need help. She has done nothing to get that help where she is, all she's done is go out with her friends and party. I'm at the end of my rope emotinally, I cry nightly just about. I want this to work, but I can't seem to convice her to come home where we can work this out. Today I called her and inquired about her phone usage at 12a for about an hour or so a couple of times.... Only to be met with "you have no business looking at my bill, going through my things.. who I talk to and when I talk to them is none of your business..." This pretty much says to me - get out of my life- I'm just so hurt about this.. I need someone to talk to, or listen.. whatever.. just someone, as I feel I have no one...

It's high time she started to wonder about YOUR commitment. Pleading, crying, showing how desparate you are .... will convince her that she is better off without you. Look at TooMuchCoffeeMan's signature line about 180 degree and Harley's Plan B.

You know what? It simply doesn't matter if she is having an A. What matters is that she isn't interested in being with you.

Go on with your life and let her come back to you.
Better now than after 10 years and 4 children....