I decided to divorce bp and have already spoken with a lawyer. I feel like I've done everything I could have done to make things work. I've stuck it out for 13 years despite the verbal and physical assaults. It was a difficult decision because I always thought that my marriage commitment was supposed to be forever. I'm still concerned for the children, although my 8 year old daughter who 3 weeks ago said "if you 2 ever divorce, I will kill myself", said on Thurs. afternoon "Mom, I think you should start thinking about divorcing Daddy because it will be better for us kids and for you". With the decision came a feeling of relief and freedom. Now I'm free to be me, and I think I've grown already! Thanks everyone for all of your help and advice over the past 3 years. It is appreciated. Mary.

Although I'm too new here to know you, it sounds like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders! It also sounds like you are doing exactly what you needed to do for you and your kids health and safety. Good luck and keep us updated.

Good luck, mp22. I've followed you and bp off and on. I know this hasn't been easy for either of you.

I wish you the best.

I am sad to hear of another family going through the divorce process. There will be a lot of pain, and suffering from both ends. But if your daughter is seeing that there is no other solution, maybe this is the right decision. God hates divorce, and that is the hardest thing to accept.

Good luck, and best wishes to all of you. Especially your kids. I and my husband which posts here regularly divorced too. Ours was an ugly divorce, and the control is still continuing as of tonight. I am moving on, and getting my life together. Just hard, with little money, and I am still on medical for the injury that was done to my shoudler and back. I hope that you get your kids in counseling, and get into a good support system.

One of the things that I am looking into is getting into a divorce therapy group. Where others who are divorced are together and we talk and get others feelings out so everyone can grow. God be with you, and your children.

Good luck to you and your family.
I've followed off and on too and it is a difficult decision, and one that has taken a long time to settle.
Try to find a rainbows class in your area. www.rainbows.org

Sometimes it is better to make this decision rather than to keep sitting on your hands. Always keep the doors open for your children and talking about their questions. There are a huge number of books in the bookstore, sadly more than repair books it seems, but the assistance and the need is there for so many people.

This site is fine if you have two married people who will show each other at least some mutual respect.

Divorce is needed sometimes. Help is always available. And prayers are infinite.

God bless you and yours. wflower