hi my name is monica . i am 23 goin on 24 on the 30th of august. i have been married to my husband , mike , 24, for three yrs, have been with him 4 in nov. we have 2 kids ,derrick and braden 3 in sept. and 8 mos. <P> onto my problem. <BR>we started out for the first yr with me getting preganat,then marrying in 5 mos later, we were great the first yr, had a rough patch when i had derrick , normal, new baby, then evrything went back to the way it was befor then i got preg again ,planned, i had a bad preg i was miserable, but my hubby stuck it out i was a real *****.<BR>now for the past 8 mos ive been trying to go back to the way it was but now my hubby for the past 2 mos has been on this insecurity trip. i mean bad to the point im ready to leave. he is constantly accussing me of cheating . i honestly dont believe he is cheating on me , i wrote to a mothers group im in and that was the response i got from them that he was cheating . things got worse when we finally got a comp a mo ago,now hes worried im gonna have cybersex. i have nvr given him reason to doubt me and yet he has absolutely no trust in me. this is all new for me cuz like i said up to 2 mo ago he nvr once even insinuated anything about this paranoia.evryday its something new. he spends his days worrying what im doing, evryday he picks a fight with me that leads to a full out screamathon , i am not exxagerating. i lost my voice for 3 days after one episode. <BR>my question is this, am i being naive or does he have a real problem ? and if it is a problem he has what can we do to fix it ? <BR>please reply as soon as possible

I don't have an answer for you, just a suggestion:<P>Post your question on the 'Emotional Needs' section. There is a lot more action over there, many helpful people with good ideas.<P>(You should get a 'welcome' post with links to helpful articles & notable posts.)<P>Hang in there a little longer until you start getting replies. Remember to judge all advice carefully, we are not professionals, just folks muddling along...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONICA!<P>I just wanted to tell you that!!!<P>Hey you guys are young, and I think part of his insecurity thing might be because of the attention you give to the children. You are probably tired and not feeling all that affectioate at the end of the day, right? So he thinks the worst.<P>When I had my babies, it was such a relief not to have them hanging off me at bedtime, that I just didn't want anyone to touch me. I look back now and wonder how my h ever stood it. Maybe it's the same with you.<P>Try to make more couple time for one another, and you get as much rest a you can, sleep or rest during the day when your babies do. That will help. Even fresh air and a walk can lift energy levels. Eat right, and try to look good. I think it will make a difference.<P>Hope it helps!

I agree with another post. Try this at the Emotional Needs Board. You will recieve a lot more advice. Pray about what you recieve. Most is from the heart though.