OK my ex and I have been divorced for 1 year now - and his other woman has always been for the last two and half years the lady who just happens to live right next door to me... Talk about a sucky situation... Anyways - he still denies that it was, is or has been her .... But now all of a sudden they are hanging out - but the problem lies with the fact that they are still lying to my children and her children - they don't tell them anything - in fact my ex has told my girls that she is just a friend and has nothing to do with our marriage ending and that it was someone else... Whatever - the simple fact is that I am at the point where frankly I think they deserve each other - but why do they continue to lie??? I saw her car at his apartment - and get this they said it was the first time she had ever been there - - - Whatever - I know they think I am stupid but the problem is they are lying to the children ... And now they are going away for a week to Florida - her kids are the reason I found out - so I am pretty sure they are gonna tell my kids - but how the heck do you get them to come clean ??? And how do you answer your kids questions when they ask - Is Dad with her???? I don't know what to do...

MAW,

I am sorry that this is happening so close to were you live. They lie because these types of realtionship rarely last after they are exposed to the light of day. It portrays him in a better light in the kids' eyes. My STBX told and continues to tell the kids that we are already divorced. They try to give the kids the impression that what they are doing is right. As far as making them come clean. You can't. It is totally up to them. If your children have questions then they really need to ask him. This is so you don't tell them something and get accused later on that you lied to them. I would talk to the kids and tell them to talk to there father. Then ask them when they come back from their visitaion if they talked to him about it and if they have any questions. If they have any then answer them if you can and if you can't send them back to talk to him the next time that he sees them.

Indy

Indy - they have talked to him and he has told them point blank they are just friends - so my youngest tells me that I don't believe him... He is such a jerk - to think that this isn't going to affect them - I mean - it really bites - my older daughter is quite angry and is not liking her Dad to much right now - and all three of us are going to therapy in a couple of weeks that ought to be interesting - she pretty much thinks he is a jack*ss - her words - sad but true...I just want the truth out in the open and I hope their relationship crashes and burns... they will get what they deserve someday... Hopefully