One is he probably still has beautiful feelings for you, and I would say jealous. First of all, I wouldn't date. You haven't even divorced your husband. If you are having sex, you are intimately involved while you are married to your husband. So if your hsuband is an adulterous man, do you want to follow his path of lies. Also, you know, as well as the rest of us, a mate out of an affair will not last. They don't last, because they were made of lies, deceit, and euphoria. Get yourself back together. The word moving on, is not dating. The word means getting your life back together, and finding yourself. Being a happy individual, and living a life of sinless acts. Your hsuband is in a train wreck, and one day, that wreck is going to fall in the hole.
Hon, this is horrible, the feelings are rough, and I have been there, and still there some. The wayward spouse, tore your heart, and has burnt your soul with deep distrust. You need to work on yourself, and find classes to take, or get involved in your church, or just get into an organization where you can help others. I am finding myself, by going to school at a University taking 2 classes each semester. I started a little job, where I get paid cash to take care of a elderly woman. I am downsizing and learning to use the computer to get rid of things around here. I am being very active in the new church here in town, and love the friends I have made there. I take an art class one day a week, and find that that is most enjoyable.
Yes, I still get really down, keep it to myself, and vent here, and I am in counseling still. Am on antidepressants, and will probably be on them for quite a while yet. My marriage was 25 years. And this has been quite difficult to move on.
Hon, you are a beautiful woman, with compassion and love. Work on yourself, and find yourself. Vent here, many people here will help you. Just sometimes, the boards are so busy, and sometimes with the holidays it is a bit slow. Keep posting your thoughts, and expressions. We are here to help you.
