I have been divorced for a year and separated for two. Dated a number of people. Some lasted for just one date, some for a couple weeks and one was startig to look good. Overall things were not looking good for me except for the fact that I was seeing a lot different women for a 37 year old guy. I took a break from it for a while and ended up meeting someone. We have been dating for 3 months and things are going great! I realize that things are new to us so they should be larger than life. But it feels so good to actually feel love from someone.

On the positive, my cheating x that filed so long ago is miserable. I thought I would never say this but after 5 years of trying to mend a broken marriage the divorce has been a good thing for me.

Hey guy I'm glad to hear that you are doing great and that your relationship with your gf is also doing great as well.

As far as your xw being miserable is that because 'pops' dumped her?

No, they are still together. I think anything that is a problem in her life will be direcly blamed on me. That is why she is so angry with me.

Do you think that her anger might have something to do with your gf?

There are a lot of things going on. To start, keep in mind she wanted a divorce, I didn't. She also had several affairs during our 11 years. I worked extensivly with this site to try and fix things.

The divorce didn't go as she palnned. She filed for full custody and we ended up 45/55, almost equal time. She didn't get the house because she moved out. She didn't get a big lump sum cash settlement either. She got just under half my retirement account. They pulled several tricks during the divorce that landed us in court. She lost those judgements too. She has lost a lot of friends too. I am a well known person where I live. A lot of people know me, I sit on public boards and am very involved in the comunity. To say the least I'm loved by many. Other than not having a wife my life was only disturbed for a short time and I moved on. Now after almost two years of separation I've found someone worth my time.

I will admit for the first 6-8 months I pushed as many buttons as she did with me. Since then I have learned to pick my fights by this methood. Will it matter tomarrow, in a week, in a month, in a year or in 10 years. You will find that a lot of stuff doesn't matter after a week, what is the sense in making it an issue.

I have been a very forgiving soft hearted man when I was married and I ended up taking a lot of abuse. I'm standing up for the right things and she is not getting her way. She is angry, very angry. I just wish she would stop being such an ugly person all the time.

didn't mean to post twice, sorry.

<small>[ January 20, 2004, 10:12 AM: Message edited by: STP ]</small>