....Greengables....I hope you're here, because I've posted my last D*MNED post at Emotional Needs.

I am soooo tired of all the cliques, the "holier than thou" attitudes, the low self-esteem bullies....Emotional Needs is the highschool of the MB site.

Something should really be done.....

Aeri, I cannot see why they are slamming you. I got slammed 100 times too over time. But I am so blunt. Sorry they slammed you. I like your honesty and your posts. You must be threatening to somebody or something. Caitie hates me too because I will not bear a hoard of children....and be trapped. I do not know who that greenie person is on EN.

I talk to a few women off the board, I do not see what the big deal is.

This is my point, Baba. I have no clue why they're slamming me---in fact, that was a completely legitimate question. When it comes to the point where I can't post questions anymore, it's time to get the hell out of the room.....

*L* Yeah, the EN board is like a HS clique alright. I wouldn't take it to heart, after all you do not toe the ultra-conservative party line there and have raised a few hackles and so there are now people that are going to disagree with you out of hand just on principle.

It's a shame but this forum has changed quite a bit from two-three years ago.

I'm sorry you feel that way--I didn't read the post--so I don't know who slammed you concerning what--

but, I do get onto Baba quite a bit though <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> but not because she doesn't want children--that's her choice and a valid one--

Aeri, here's what you should do.

1. Bend over
2. Submit
3. Act like a victim


Then they will like you.

You are too "independent and free" now, most are still trapped in heinous lives of their own making. You were smart enough to GET THE HECK OUT OF YOUR HELL!

I feel sorry for many of them. I like many of them also. I was trapped in my many insecurities but now I am nearly free now also.

This board is nothing like it was 3 years ago. People used to be on here to help people now it's all about "me" and my beliefs the heck with others opinions and beliefs.

And Aeri, anytime "Thorned" confronts me, I learn endless amounts from it. So I welcome her wisdom and confrontation any day any time!

Yeah and you better knock it off with all that free thinkin', ya' danged radical leftist. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

I don't mind being confronted. Hell--I have MB to thank for opening my eyes about my husband's problems....It was MB that helped me realize that he was mentally unstable....

I love debate. I love talking about dieting and politics, as well as relationships---but HELL, did you see what I'm subjected to in there? Someone said they opened a bottle of Champagne when I posted about my POJA to leave the board!

In highschool, the cliquey people were always the ones who had low self esteem--the needed the security of a 'group' to be themselves. I see the very same traits in EN. Before they were civil enough to keep their BS within certain boundaries, but now it's just gone hog wild....

I'm a believer in "you fly with the crows, you die with the crows". I just don't want to be a part of that lunacy any longer.

aeri ---

Just a quick comment - because I sometimes feel you think I slam you too.

I have a very different experience of life from yours, and I differ with your basic opinions much of the time. I don't intend that difference to be hurtful or to anger you - just that it is a difference of opinion and deserves to be heard just like yours.

Sometimes we take things too personally.

The posts to you on MB about the POJA not to respond to people off board was rediculous - and NOT part of the "EN crowd". Yeah, we have our own little wanna be gang over there - but we are all pretty stable. Asking the question doesn't set us off. It's when you don't listen and follow our advice that we go off --- we expect compliance. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> Whether we get it or not. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

There have been some newbies recently that set everyone on edge and make things a bit hectic, but they'll either disappear or change and comply eventually <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> . Don't get too excited about them.

And - don't get mad at me for the way I worded this either - I just woke up... I woke up early this morning and wrote a Service Report and went back to bed - so I'm now feeling kind of groggy... Need coffee!!!!

Hugs,

Jan

Jan is right about the newbies, AERI.

THEY WILL BE ASSIMILATED!

RESISTANCE IS FUTILE!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by *^aeri^*:
<strong> I am soooo tired of all the cliques, the "holier than thou" attitudes, the low self-esteem bullies....Emotional Needs is the highschool of the MB site.

Something should really be done..... </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Aeri, Aeri, Aeri. We see what is within ourselves.

Frankly, I like your edgy straight-forward style. But if you took green-whatever as "antagonistic", then you're rather thin-skinned because you dish out that edgy style that comes across to others as antagonistic. You've been pretty confrontational with several people - yet when someone gets confrontational with you, you're picking up your toys and going home???

What's with that? You strike me as much tougher than that. I think your straight-talker style is just what some people need. I just wish you could take it yourself! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

aeri - I read your post on EN and frankly I don't see what the big deal is - I read it because I have posted to a few people off line - and I see absolutely nothing wrong with it.. In the beginning when I was at my absolute bottom - I started emailing a woman who was wonderful - she had in her signature line if you want a mentor -email me - and I tell you through those dark days - I couldn't have made it without her constant emails - since then - I have become great friends with two other woman off of these boards and I email them both daily - one ended up getting divorced like me and the other is still married - and as for men - I am in contact with two off of the board quite regularly - and they have been both very supportive ... Everyone has different views that is why sometimes I think in my case it is easier to have that one on one communication with someone who has been through the same thing.. I wouldn't let other people bother you - it is their own opinion just like you have yours....So just ignore those posts....

Hi Aeri,

Seems some newbies made some cracks, and the regulars defended you <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> . Star and SJ came right out and called the newbie on her crack and defended you, nelly, redhat and several others honestly answered your question. I though you came out smelling like a rose... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Guess I'm kinda oblivious to the clicky nature of the boards. I cruise 'most recent topics' and post wherever! Please take care - Dru

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> But if you took green-whatever as "antagonistic", then you're rather thin-skinned because you dish out that edgy style that comes across to others as antagonistic. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I commented on this person's antagonism because it appeared to be misplaced....

I asked a valid question---I only referenced WFLOWER because it was her post along with Takola which prompted me to write the message.

Apparently, the sensitive bunch took my usage of WFLOWER's name as a direct threat (to what, I'll never know)....I don't consider myself "thin-skinned"...I'm not feeling defensive over what happened..I'm just annoyed.

Can't we be adults? It seems like that nouveau politically correct crowd doesn't like questions.....Have you read my thread there recently? They're complaining because I've answered one too many of WFLOWER's posts.

I think it should be alright for me to post a question---I have something like 600 posts to my credit and I've been here about 18 months.....mirror that with some people and you wonder if they even sleep at night...

<small>[ January 27, 2004, 07:16 PM: Message edited by: *^aeri^* ]</small>

Yes, Aeri, I know. There are a bunch of hypersensitive people out there. But you came here threatening to revoke your membership - so I asked you about your own thin skin. I didn't take you for that kind of person who was easily offended. Frankly, you surprised me with this thread.

Mmm...KaylaAndy....I'm beginning to think that some of the members here might be taking me wrong.

Don't take my words so seriously--many of the things I post are more or less facetious....Did you really think I was going to hand in my MB member card? Come on! I have too much fun here! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

In all seriousness though, I came here for a bit of solitude...hopefully to find Green Gables (who didn't show, incidently!)

Trying to revoke your membership to MB is like trying to call and "cancel" the free Tuesday paper delivered to your door with all the ads and the Food Day Recipes!

Have you ever tried to cancel that, it just keeps coming and coming and coming even if you are on vacation!

(But I have felt as you do at times and I understand how you feel!)

I didn't read your other posts Aeri, but I agree about the "cliquishness." But, I too would encourage you to try not to take it personal. Be active in your "real life"-- make and keep good friends, be outdoors, have hobbies, work hard, help others, contribute to society, exercise, sleep, etc... and you'll find that this forum is more of an afterthought than a major part of your life.

I like Drucilla's perspective... she doesn't notice the cliquishness because she doesn't spend all her time on the EN board! I really don't think it's good to be a "regular" of the board.. that means that you invest ALOT of time here and there are soooooo many other good things you can do with your time that would be more beneficial (in my opinion).

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yeah, we have our own little wanna be gang over there .</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">That's why Aeri, and others, see it as "cliquish." Well, that, and the fact that you want the "newbies" to leave. Unless a "newbie" has violated the TOS, they have every right to be here as you or any of the "regulars" do... even if you find them to be rude or they ruffle your feathers. I personally hope more "newbies" join because I think it would help keep it from being "cliquish" and dominated by any one or more people.

And Aeri, that's something to keep in mind. There is no place in life where you can avoid rudeness or maybe people who offend or cause you discomfort. Sometimes, you have to just shrug it off, forgive, and either put some distance between you and the person or learn to "live with it" the best you can. That's how it is in real-life interactions. There are the people you avoid because they are unhealthy or "toxic" people or they don't share your same values or for whatever other reason. And there are those whom you share your thoughts/feelings with, etc.

The thing with a public forum is that when you share your thoughts, anyone and everyone can read it... the ones who agree, the ones who disagree, the healthy and the unhealthy, etc. So you take a risk. The MB board consists of a pretty big variety of people... men and women, young and old, different faiths and beliefs, etc. So when you post your questions or thoughts, you do so at your own risk. Something to keep in mind.

Dr. Phil says that if you seek free advice, you get what you pay for! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ January 28, 2004, 12:48 AM: Message edited by: LoveMyEx ]</small>