Things To Ponder (or not)

1. Can you cry under water?

2. When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just
"chunkydunk."

3. How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

4. If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

5. Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

6. Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

7. Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

8. How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

9. Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake-up like every two hours?

10. If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

11. Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

12. How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

13. If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

14. I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

15. Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

16. Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

17. Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

18. Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

19. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

20. Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.


Just thought we could all use a little comic relief!

r0uter

I really enjoyed this. Going to past and send to some friends of mine. Great stuff.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Things To Ponder (or not)

1. Can you cry under water? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Dunno, but you can scream in a vacuum; should sound about the same.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">5. Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Escrow.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">7. Why does a round pizza come in a square box? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Didja ever try to fold a round corner?
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">8. How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Simple: astronauts don't use luggage.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">10. If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes, unless the courtroom is deafening. (Come on; ya wouldn't call it a tasting, would ya?)
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">12. How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Availability of qualified candidates.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">16. Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Nah, it just means you dozed off while driving.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">18. Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Its easier to appologize than ask permission. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">17. Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yeah, but then we could have always lived on the moon, and luggage would have always had wheels. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

If a blind person goes missing and they are seen by someone, is the blind person sighted? Or is that sited? Or what would they be.