I filed for divorce on 2-5-03, that's right, 1 year ago. History is long and sorted with dirt on both sides. So why post now? W wants to reconcile. We were so close to getting a signed settlement that 1 word stopped it all...'co-habitation'. Her attorney advised her not to sign the settlement unless that stipulation was removed. W says she went back to old boyfriend to see if she could 'get rid of her love for me'. Instead (she says) she cannot stop loving me no matter what. She says she can't survive without me because I am half of her being.
I filed for divorce because I knew she would be back with her Om soon and I was right. She has slept with him 4-5 times now and she says she cannot stand to be with him any more.
I have asked my attorney to remove the cohabitation stipulation so there are NO roadblocks for her to NOT sign.
So the question begs...
Do I give her ANOTHER (#8) chance???

I am assuming she was he one who started the infidelity. If that is the case, no way. You are in a sense 'second prize'. Since her other situation didn't work, she now comes back for you. Post more detail about your situation, that might help with some insight.

I had a EA/PA from 1-01 to 7-01. She had a EA/PA from 6-01 to 10-02 during which time we went to
IC/MC. She lied about her EA/PA during the MC. I filed in 2-02 because she said she wasn't ready for additional MC.
W then told everyone how I ruined her entire life. Then in 11-03 she started up with OM again. I have given her 7 prior chances to break off with OM during her 16 month EA/PA. Now she wants back.

The real question is, do you want to reconcile with her. Do you love her enough to put the past behind you and have a new begining.

Couples can survive an A. The just have to want to.

You may want to consider a period of putting D on hold to re discover each other

If she has been given 7 chances to reconcile over a 16 month period than what she says does not mean anything at this point. If she has indeed broken it off with the OM what is she doing to show you that she is being honest and committed to rebuilding the marriage.

I would not change the paperwork but I would post-pone the D. See where things can lead to. A's can do all sorts of weird things to the mind of the WS. Time is the only way to build trust and healing. Give it some time before the D to see if she will be committed and pray about all of it.

I have decided to place the divorce on a 30 day hold to see if reconciliation can happen. I do feel like she has jerked my guilt chain again. But I will give it a try to see if love can return.
If not, I'll be the bad guy to make her happy.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> But I will give it a try to see if love can return </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If you want love to return, you need to be prepared to go in head first, whole heartedly, with no expectations of anything but it returning.

Don't do it just to say you tried, really try