My WW is an idiot. I have been posting for about a 2 months trying to figure out how to get back together with her and each day that goes by we toss it back and forth. She mostly says absolutely not. Crying and thinking what could I have done to destroy a 17 year marriage. Nothing but put my best foot forward! I think I finally figured it out that my wife has a serious case of poor judgement. I recently found out that her boyfriend is just a crook and has her in a spell. She has been visiting him in jail and has been receiving letters from him. This is not the first vistit to the pokey! This explains why she said she was just going to just write him from now on. I am amazed that she would give me up for someone like this. I have been hard working and have been going to school to make sure that all of us me, W and 4 kids could have a good life. She takes all of this and throws me away for some thug who will just lead her down a path of destruction. I just don't get it. I am sad because she has made some bad choices by leaving me for this. But I have to laugh. The real sad part about it is that I still love this woman.
I got this information by seaching for this guy's history. I think I will go ahead and file and go for the children because I don't want my children around something like this. What a stupid B.

Any thoughts. I know I posted in anger.

sorry for your situation, need not apoligize for anger. sometimes it can save us from danger. your family is in danger apparently. your wife is seriously deranged in some way. on here the sophisticated seem to prefer the word fog. for the sake of your family , that is children, you need to file. often its the fastest way to some resolution to such a crisis. she will flounder, become unhappy, later become afraid of him, and will have to fight her pride, eventually she will cave in. but she will first try to get you to agree to forgive and forget. this will not be in her best interests or that of your family. if you continue to love her, it must be tough love. that is draw the boundaries, do not give in to any demands of hers. if you someday allow her back in family circle make certain she understands its your way or no way. counseling would be approiate for her. do not allow her to have children around him. go to court, take the steps. document everything you know. remember this is for her good, as well as the family. build the emotional stone wall, your mantra may well be this is for the greater good when you feel yourself weaken. I, like many here, wish you strenth and good fortune.

Pheonix

Keep working hard and going to school. Even if it isn't for all of you, at least you know that it is for you and the 4 kids.

I have 4 kids also and everything I do now is for them and always will be. If STBXW wants some of it, she needs to earn it.

Nothing wrong with posting in anger. Better to bring it here than to her.