My divorce was final in June 2003. We completely separated in August 2002. At that time I felt sad but liberated and hopeful for a better future. I was on a mission to improve my life and be happy. I was okay for a while. Now it seems that things are worse. I don't miss my ex-husband for the most part. Things were really bad. I was doing so well.

Now, things are so much more difficult it seems. The time just seems to go so fast. I am now very aware of how my parents are aging. I am an only child from a very small family. When my parents and grandmother (who is 81) are gone, I will be alone. Lately, this has bothered me so much. It just seems that all of the sudden I have awaken from a dream and my family is so much older.

I have a difficult time seeing my friends that are starting their families. I am 32 and want to have children some day. It hurts. I know I have time still but it still hurts.

I have a good boyfriend. We have been together for several months. He treats me very well and I care for him quite a bit. However, I am responsible for making myself happy and I seem to be having trouble lately.

Have any of you gone through this after a divorce? Am I normal? Any suggestions on some good books to read or verses from the Bible? I have been in counseling before and I am ready to return. However, my insurance does not cover anything. My church offers a community counseling center that I have visited. However, because of my salary from my job, I must pay the top amount for every session. Being single, it is difficult to pay this every week or so.

I guess I just needed to vent somewhere. I hate to sound so negative because I am not normally like this!

What you feel is perfectly normal! I am sure that everyone would love to say, "You are young! You have your life ahead of you!" -- but you still feel the way you do. No matter what anyone says, it still hurts.

Being alone in your family IS worrisome. Yes, in time your parents will pass on, BUT, know that you won't be alone when they do. Take comfort in knowing that you will have a family of your own, be it your own children, or extended family and friends that love you and cherish you.

Counselling did help me focus on those gems in my life when the world seemed so very lonely. I'm an avid book reader, so besides the Bible, I also read "Feel the Fear and Do it Anyways". It was kind of like having mini-counselling sessions every day, which helped me do some amazing things in my life. Today, I don't have a significant other, but most days (ok....29 days out of 31 <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> ) I am "alone" but not "lonely".

Surround yourself with positive people. Take up a class that you've always wanted to do. Volunteer with those who really would appreciate your help. Counselling at church, or a support group (whether it be a Boundaries class, DivorceCare class or something similar at a local church) will help you with the feelings you are having.

Your feelings are normal, of course!!
I had them even before I was married, and they are not related to just post divorce period&#8230;

Please work on NOT relying on having a family of your own in order not to be alone!
You have and always will have - yourself!

If you are not afraid of staying just with yourself in the future &#8211; nobody will. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Surround yourself with happy people.
If you are happy with yourself, people will want to be around you.
Healthy people attract healthy people.

And about families. They come in all shapes and sizes, and many aren't even blood related. I grew up with many "aunts". They weren't blood relations - more friends of my parents, but they were closer than many family members.
I have cousins who are closer to me than many people's own siblings are.
Create your own family and build a life for yourself. Visualize it and make it happen.
Have you looked into becoming a "big sister"?