Does anyone here think their ex-spouse reads your post here.
I just wonder, I know right after I was kicked out of my house my ex was reading my post.
She was reading them and using them against me.
So I wonder if she still reads them?
Maybe she does, maybe she does just to see how much she has hurt my family and me.

Why do I still post here anyway?
I have no way of using the Marriage Builder techniques in our failed marriage.
I can change myself though, I just can't rebuild our marriage. I would do anything to try.
But when there is a third person involved and she has turned all of her energy to him, there is no chance.
So I think I post here as sort of a pain reliever, when I get down I like to get input, I like to see other's situations. I like to see when you feel like when there is no hope, there is. Even if it is not the hope you wanted.
How long must the betrayed spouse feel so betrayed? How long must I hurt.
I am constantly exposed to my hurt.
Everyday I see my ex and him, I see what was my family. Will I ever get used to this, should I even try to get used to it?
So if my ex is reading this, I hope your enjoying my pain. Because I am not.

rufustfirefly

I've seen spouses go at in like cats and dogs through posts here.

I would guess that your x wouldn't want to read your posts just to keep from feeling guilty but sometimes they may pop in to see what bad things you're saying about them.

A lot of us are here for the same support as you. Still wish things could be different but realize that it is not likely.

I still use MB techniques w STBX and probably always will. I think I'll be in plan A for the rest of my life but thats ok with me because I know that one way or another STBX will realize that she made a mistake but it will probably be too late.

WIWH

WIWH

goodness..... I hope not.
I mean... in a way, I think it might give her some perspective... but, I'd rather this all be kept away from her.

rufus,

I don't know if it is x or his wife that reads my posts here. Neither of them have ever posted here.

Why do they read, I don't know! I did ask why and he couldn't answer.

Having that third person involvment is very hard, can't really work on anything but yourself til that person is gone.

My x never even put forth any effort. After 21 years, said that he never loved me and wanted a divorce, took him almost 3 years to get one and a lot of $$'s. Hope she was worth it!!!! I get slapped with how well I am doing and because of that he is barely making it and tries to blame me, gets very angry when I tell him that sleeping next to him is the reason he is doing so poorly in the $$$ area, not me!

I still post for many reasons, it's a place I am comfortable, I like it here, maybe I can help someone else, there where so many that helped me back in the day!!!! I need the support that I get from the site. It's still a good place to hang out, so I do. I don't post much anymore, every once in awhile, when something is bothering me, but I do read every day. It's selfish, it's my place while still at home doing what I need to do here!!! If that makes any sense at all!!!!!


Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I know that my ex used to read my posts...I think he was nibbibng to see what I was saying about him. Once I made a comment that I made plans to go out with a few friends just as soon as my ex got home from work one Friday....he read it and I know because he made plans for contact with OW while I was out!!! Then he had to tell her he made a mistake and I was home all night LOL!! We had decided at the last minute that after a long week at work we all just were too tired to go out on the town. Of course I found out his plan through my own snooping...so I am no better than him am I????

Know what else...I think that maybe they are eager to find out things that we may not have the nerve to tell them...things that we share and vent to each other here...
Just an idea...

I'm still wondering if my X can read!
I know he doesn't read here.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

or if they are hearing impaired <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

My STBXW is not that open to counseling and only went for herself, not the marriage after she left. If she read my posts, she would surly turn tail and run to get this over with before I really get angry with her lies, fantasies, and constant needleing and she ends up in jail with nothing. She actually had an email open for my daughter to see when she visited. It was more lies just to try to worry me. What a waste of energy. If she put as much energy into our marriage, as she is into trying to bury me, we would make it to 40 years.LOL.

I was posting in emotional needs and my H (seperated, but still married) found out and read everything I wrote. He was very upset, but not really about what I wrote, but just because I was posting. He doesnt feel I should have been on here talking to people. I really dont care that he read everything, I didnt say anything untrue or I wouldnt say to him. But I did feel violated and I was unable to come here for a few weeks.
I have changed my log in name, so who knows if he has found me & is still reading.
The reason I was posting was that I was talking w/ people who were in the same shoes as i am. They totally understand1 It's not like I was in a chat room talking w/ men or something.

I post here, and as many of you know, my ex reads and posts here too. There has been many posts of pure anger and hostility.

I read my ex's post here as SNL while he was in his affair with the other woman, and put me down, and said here on MB how he didn't love me, only loved the other woman. He is the one who brought me to marriage builders. Maybe he wanted me to see what he was writing about me and how terrible of a person I was for him. I know what he wrote hurt me deeply, and has caused severe pain. But that was what he chose to do.

What I write now, I write carefully. I do tell the truth.

My STBXH has been an MB poster in the past. If he still posts, he has changed his name and I haven’t caught on. He told me his OW also posted. STBXH used his (interesting <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> )interpretation of MB principles to counsel her regarding her marital issues…and I’m told that interaction led to their affair.

Consequently, I have not posted since I heard she was on the boards. The idea of either of them reading my thoughts is too much. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<small>[ May 01, 2004, 11:05 PM: Message edited by: lws ]</small>