It is so amazing how in a moment you can blink and your whole world is destroyed. I have 11 years of memories of a beautiful family: My wife and I with our two children (10/9) playing in the Gulf Shore Waters during a family vacation,etc.

Now I wake up alone and longing for the family to be restored. I can clearly see what led to our present situation.. lack of communication and me being to controlling and her being to submissive. She has moved out into an apartment 2 months ago and got a job (She home schooled all the children's lives) and plans on starting college classes next week. She still tries to see the children off the bus daily on her way to work.

Last week she filesd for divorce and said she had a peace about it - She left me the house and the children... She wanted them to stay in the same neighborhood and school. She looks at this situation as a new start for both of us. She feels we both are "co-dependent" on each other and need to figure out who we each are as individuals... and "maybe" a chance to re-marry in the future. She praises me for doing such a great job with the children and keeping the house going, but it is not enought to try agian and repair the distance between us.

I love her deeply. She was my first love out of high school. We married at 19&20. This situation has been on-going for 6 months. Now I must put my faith and hope in God to fix this mess we made...

Any thoughts?

Cincy,

Wow...I am so sorry, man. I have a similar situation; lack of communication / unwillingness to confront our issues, combined with my temper and her criticism, just eroded our marriage. I didn't see it mounting...sounds like you're in the same boat.

Well, hang in there...keep checking out this web site, cause it's a great source for support and ideas. You will be in my prayers tomorrow while in church...God Bless you.

Welcome to marriagebuilders. It is a great place to be under the circumstances. You can start in Plan A. Read all about it here. You may be able to turn this around.

Got the papers today. Guess she followed though with it after all. I am so confused though. She has given me temporary custody of the children and allowing me to keep the house. She wants the old to marriage to die. Then she says a new start at the relationship might be possible. Why does she need to take the whole family through the emotional hurt of divorce to start again? I just can not understand that viewpoint. She wants a fresh start - How should I deal with this situation? I love her and want her to be my wife - feeling in limbo!