ok...ok....ok...

Now I all know you've been in that place of anger...and sheer wanting to get EVEN. The WORST thing I ever did was cut a button off EVERYONE of his shirts (right in the middle of the chest) and kept all those buttons in a bag. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> The man never knew how to do anything and it gave me great pleasure (that was at the beginning of this whole thing called "divorce")

Flash forward 5 years....and now revenge is:
- having dinner with a great group of friends and sharing so much laughter that your cheeks hurt
-coming home content on a great day of work and loving arms (my kids) around me telling me they love me
-having little notes left for me just to say someone cares
-having the tv changer all to myself
-eating food that I want to eat
-not answering the telephone if I want peace and quiet

ok...ok....so maybe this thread should be called "what made it worth it?"

In a word ------->Peace

blessings to you all. May the journey ahead be full of pleasant surprises.

<small>[ August 30, 2004, 09:06 PM: Message edited by: laura_lee ]</small>

I can only dream of such an outcome... and can hardly wait for such a day...

Thanks for the words of encouragement!
And I'm sooooooooo happy for you!!!

Elan:

Yep, it's often said that "the best revenge is 2 live well." But, in truth, as you've probably realized, the best revenge isn't revenge at all.

best,
-ol' 2long

Elan,
I LOVE IT...I would never have thought of doing something like that...but I got a good chuckle from it.

I like where you are...and hope to get there soon. Thanks for the smile. Pat

better yet would have been just to cut the threads on the inside so when he is all spiffed up out with OW the buttons would come off and embarass him <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

never tried it though

all spiffed up..... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Well...it was the worst thing that I did, and after I did it, I felt wonderful. Be it wrong or right.... it was in the past. Now I look back and chuckle. I didn't do it to hurt him, I just knew that he would have to ask me to sew them back on! (but he went out and bought new clothes).

Yep..the best revenge is living well...and living well to me is not monetary, but having healthy relationships with my kids, having gratitude for the things that I never had before, and the list could go on. So many great things have happened, that I think when you are in the middle of the divorce/separation you forget to really count your blessings. One thing that really helped me focus on the more positive things was to start a gratitude journal. Believe it or not, I kept it in the bathroom with a pen. At the end of the day, I would make a point of putting ONE thing at least in that little book....be it ----> I am grateful that we didn't have rain today OR I am grateful for the sunshine OR I am grateful that when I was driving home today the sky was so clear I could see the mountains OR I am grateful that my sheets smell like those new Bounce sheets I bought.

I think sometimes we get so enmeshed in our divorces and the pain of others that we tend to forget all those great things mixed in with the pain. It's only down the road that you really start seeing the blessings!

ohhhh yes....and on another note ---> right in the middle of it I really wanted to send him a subscription for a gay magazine sent to the office <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> (the little evil in me) or maybe write "the idiot lives here" with grass fertilizer on his lawn (yet another little evil giggle.....) Honestly....I wouldn't do it, but it sure made me smile just thinking about it! (insert one of those little happy faces here with the horns!)

Cheers all! and remember.....smile! Sometimes in the middle of all this stuff, the only thing you CAN do is laugh, giggle, maybe daydream.

Thank you for not only validating that life should be lived well, but in the midst of "stuff" not to forget to appreciate at least ONE THING everyday.

All the ideas we have had for "revenge" are improved if they are only fantasies. We can then also pat ourselves on the back and be proud that we did not follow through!

Fantasies I have had include putting his and her profiles (would have fun writing this as well:)) and pictures on every internet dating service, giving his work e-mail for both profiles! I would not bother wasting my effort and energy doing this though.