It's been nearly two years since my divorce. Life is great. I'm in a wonderful relationship with a terrific, sensitive and caring man. I have a great job and am doing things (fun things) I could never imagine myself doing two years ago.

Over the last few months some things surfaced about my XH and the OW. They are living together in OW's city. Because of some of the info that was uncovered - I realize now I had been lied to for much longer than I thought and the OW seemed to have played a much bigger role in the deception. And, to top it all off, the OW is not very attractive at all. I'm only saying this because my XH was SO into "looks, clothes and cars." He's 28, she's 40ish with a teenage daughter and adolescent son.

I didn't think learning this would bother me, but it really does. I played a near perfect Plan A and Plan B and right now I just feel like telling someone off. Anyone ever feel that way? Not that this would make anything better, but that's how I feel.

Thanks in advance.

Llama

(((llama)))

It's great to hear from you and it sounds like all is well on the homefront.

I'm just about 3 years post-divorce. Not dating but do have a great job and am surrounded by many friends. The events of the lost 6 months have allowed me to grow in many ways.

Hugs, Thoughts, & Prayers

{{{Bill}}}}

Great to hear from you! I was actually looking at some of my older posts today - and you were in several. Boy have we come a long way. Thanks for the note.

Llama

Part of Dr.Harley's marital recovery plan is immediate "radical honesty". The reasons being, to basically get it all out in the open, so that when the healing does begin, the wounds won't be slashed open again.

I would imagine, that it still feels the same way, even after a D. The wounds are being reopened, and in effect, you're going through another form of d-day.

(((((( llama ))))))

Karen

Glad to hear you're doing well Llama! And no, it's normal. You've healed much of that old wound but when they pull stupid stunts or we find out we've been further betrayed it will re open that wound for a time.

And I too find out more and more and more. It's probably gone on longer than I knew too as his whole family is completely cool with everything now. In fact, I know now that my xIL's have met both mistresses...one of which they knew and met when I was married and still living with my xh.

Just remember that this is not your problem anymore. They are the ones to have to keep up with their own lies. You don't need to worry with it anymore. After all, what is one more lie from a confirmed liar and cheater? Nothin' but a thing ok?

You did all you could do and my hat is off to you. What is to be very proud of is the fact you fought for your family and marriage. That's what sets alot of us here on the divorced boards apart from the people out there walking the streets. We don't give in easily and we stand up for something that we believe is greater than ourselves...our families. I know after this that I will be able to walk thru fire for those I love and say that unabashedly.

You've lived more, learned more, and know that you can for sure love more. I believe blessings are definitely in store for you and for us here.

Almost three years since my divorce and oh how I wish my ex would move on ... he has way too much free time to screw with my life. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

I think it is possible he does it because I am living well and happy, and he is clearly not happy. Rather than focus on bettering himself, he sees me as the root of all his problems and seems to conjure up things to hassle me.

The fun part is, I look good and I feel good. He might not look me in the eyes when we talk (always stares off like he's above looking AT me), but I know he's watchin' when I'm walkin' away! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

YES the ex-Princess is rejoicing because she bought new blue jeans and can STILL WEAR SIZE 8!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> There is joy in all the land! LOL

<small>[ August 30, 2004, 09:35 PM: Message edited by: laura_lee ]</small>