This is my first time posting. Three days ago, out of the blue, hubby told me in therapy that he doesn't want to be married.

I AM DYING! I am 100% positive that this is what a heart attack feels like. I can't get past the godawful pain. We are still going to therapy. (uh, ok?) He has more issues than I can count. He's angry with my grief for reasons unbeknownced to me. He can't express any emotions other than anger.

I want to do this. I made a vow, a promise. I can't look at him and not want to kiss him, to hug him, to touch him. I tell him I love him every day.

Yesterday I asked "If I told you that I will love you and keep trying to work things out until you tell me to stop, would you stop?" His reply was "I don't know". That's his "answer" for everything. He doesn't know what he wants in life, love, marriage, career, etc.

Can I get through this? Can WE?

Thank you much in advance.
Jill

How long have you been together and how long married. You don't mention kids so I am assuming you don't have any. What are your ages? Yes, you will get through this what ever way it goes. It will be hard and it will hurt (yes, if feels like your dying practically, but we don't) He must of given you some idea of why he says he doesn't want to be married anymore. You ask if "we" will get through this. It all depends. If hubby still wants to try or not, but if he's saying he doesn't want to be married anymore... You can't make him do something he doesn't want to do.

You're right and I have considerably changed my tune since yesterday. We are both 25, married 6 years, no kids.

I read "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz and as much as it hurts, I think I'm done as well. I don't think we can ever ever ever go back to before "he dumped me". So I've made MY decision and that is to walk away.

Now, we have to figure out living arrangements. Any advice? We talked about being "roommates" so we can pay off bills before the big-D. Is this a bad idea?

Thanks for your reply!
Jill