My wife and I have what I thought was a good relationship. This Wednesday I was served with a restraining order to stay away from her and my step-son and son who is 1 1/2. My heart was completley broke! I had to leave work and all I wanted to do was call her and find out why. Well that afternoon after I got my head back together I headed to the bank and she had already closed our account and took all of the money. By the end of the day she had disconnected our phone at home. Today is Friday and I have yet to talk or even see my son and it is terrible. I have never hit, or even yelled at him or my wife. I don't know what is going on and I won't find out till next Friday when our court date is set for the restraining order. This Sunday is Fathers day and it is really going to hurt when I don't get to see him or even my wife. I have been tempted to call her at her parents but I know that she would be able to use that against me next Friday. Does anyone have any ideas on how to win a womans love back? I really need something because I want to keep us together for us and our sons. Thanks!

There is clearly a lot more to this than you can see right now. A spouse doesn't just wake up one day and put in a restraining order, disconnect the phone and move out. That takes a few weeks of planning ... at least. You do have to be careful because of the restraining order.

Things to consider (and none of these are pretty)
Does your wife have any history of "not coping"? (eg, depression, nervous breakdowns)
Is an affair possible?

Have you got friends/family who can support you? You must be very careful not to do anything that will jeopardise your contact with your sons.

Take care!

Yes she does have a history of depression and that has crossed my mind. I just don't think that it is fair that she can do this to me and my children. I want to talk to her, but like you said I don't want to hurt my chances with my children.

I would recommend to you that you read Michele Weiner Davis' books "Divorce Busting" and/or Divorce Remedy" right away as she discusses the situation of walk-away wives in detail in them. She discusses the reasons why wives want to end their marriages and strategies to deal with that. She also has a forum you could read about others in your situation on divorcebusting.com. Of course come here too! You are probably in shock right now. Try to keep eating and get some meds from your family doc if you can't function well at work. Focus on what you can control right now which is yourself. Take care- lifeismessy

Thank you very much! Well as everyone can see I made it through the weekend without seeing my sons or my wife on Fathers Day. It wasn't easy because I sat by the window all day waiting for her to surprise me by bringing my sons over but it never happened. I will go to this website and see how much it helps. Thank you everyone for your help.

Hi again- I hope you will get the books I recommended and visit that website- that forum there I recommended because it has a section specifically about walk-away wives. I would also suggest you read Harley's excellent book "Surviving an Affair' in case you discover that is part of your upsetting equation. It has good strategy advice to follow in it. Don't be surprised if youre not real mad right now- I was in shock for months before the anger started to really set in. My H of 15 yrs totally surprised me when he announced on Valentines Day morning that "our marriage had been over in his head for some time" and that he was in love with someone else( wouldn't even tell me her name) and he was leaving me and our 3 kids. I never in a million years thought he would do such a thing.I was as shocked as if a hurricane had opened up and swallowed me whole! Right now just focus on getting thru the day, read those books and also ask friends for the name of a good attorney to consult with- you'll need to do that even if you really don't want a divorce. Your W has had her plans in mind for quite a while as Enigma told you- you are way back on the curve of the circle so don't expect things to make sense for quite some time! Take care- lifeismessy

I'd also recommend "The Walk Out Woman"

The book description reads:

Every woman longs to be appreciated, respected, and adored, but when her needs aren't met within her marriage, she could be tempted to walk away. As little hurts and disappointments accumulate and her heart hardens, a woman's loneliness and vulnerability take over, and she might find emotional fulfillment elsewhere, perhaps in even a casual encounter with another man. When the marriage enters this realm of real danger, the woman believes it will be less painful to walk away than try to work on it. With heart and wisdom, Dr. Steve Stephens and Alice Gray offer practical advice for how to stop this epidemic of walk-out women. They outline the warning signs of severe marital discontent and share how to reconnect with your spouse, communicate your hurt, and open your heart. If both partners are willing to work at it, any marriage can be saved.