OK. Now I have wuit drinking, followed the Harleys books and my wife wants to come back,and then she doesnt, back and forth. She feels like an idiot for this and seems sincere in wanting to fix things. Any thoughts folks?<p> Another thing. She says that before she left, one of the reasons she left, was that even though I havent "forced" her to have sex in years she cant enjoy it for the flashbacks of when she says 20 years ago I did, (and I honestly do not remember but I drank then. Any thoughts on how to undo that?!?!?!

I am a stubborn and look at this like peeling an onion. We do a lot of crying in the process and every time I get trough a layer a new one greets me. But I aint giving up, just looking for a sharp knife(figuratively speaking).