Hi! I used to spend a lot of time on this site when my marriage was failing and found it quite helpful. Now almost 3 years later I am divorced and still heartbroken. My ex husband wanted out and I soon came to find there was someone else involved. We went through a horrible custody battle over our then 1 1/2 year old and a bitter divorce. I won sole custody and got grounds for divorce on abandomnment. He visits with our son every other weekend and takes him for a couple weeks in the summer. He is no longer with that woman.

I since have moved on and made the best of a bad situation. God has really blessed me and been with me all throughout. I'm doing well in my job and am able to take care of my son and provide him with a nice lifestyle. I have even been dating a great man who loves me and my son and he wants to get married. I met him about 9 months after I seperated but only would have a friendship with him for the past 1 1/2 years or so. He became one of my best friends through all I was going through and in the past couple months I've been "dating" him. Problem is, now that I think about possibly getting married to him I am starting to grieve the loss of my marriage again. I was forced to move on but deep in my heart I always thought when my husband was done with his "thing" he would miss us and want to reconcile. It hasn't happened. As much as I love the man in my life now I don't think I could ever love anyone like I loved my husband. He was my soulmate and I was so committed to him. Even now after an affair and all the things we have gone through if he were willing I would try to rekindle our love and restore our family. But if we couldn't do it then how can we do it now? He's a very proud guy and even if he missed me in the slightest he would never let me know. But I have tried to see in the past if there was anything left for us to work on and he has continually closed the doors. He blames me for him leaving and won't take responsiblilty for what he did at all. But my heart still longs for him. Am I stupid? Should I just keep looking forward or should I try one more time to see if there's a chance. I'm doubtful myself but I can't seem to get over him. I need to find closure someway somehow before I ever think about moving into another marriage. I'm just so confused! If you could give me a little advice I'd so appreciate it!