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need help!
#773334 06/23/04 02:44 PM
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 2
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ayrton13 Offline OP
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ayrton13
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Joined: Jun 2004
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A little background 1st, about 10 months ago found out wife having affair, and after much struggle we decided to go to counceling and try to work it out. Everything was great til about 1 month ago when wife seemed to become distant again. After finally talking she said there just is no spark anymore and she dosen't see it ever comming back. She also stated she is willing to stay together and make the best of situation for 6 year old daughters sake, but that counceling won't help basicaly she is done trying on relationship. I have offered to move out and get an apartment but not divorce. I guess my question is, what should I do. I still love her and would like another shot at this but feel the only way is to give her space. Anyone with similar situation please respond
Re: need help!
#773335 06/23/04 03:08 PM
Joined: Apr 2003
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deadtoitall Offline
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deadtoitall
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I most definitely would NOT move out. If, perchance, things do not work out and the worst happens, the courts would take in consideration that you left, abandoned, deserted, whatever word they chose and it would kill your chances of getting custody. Suggest she move out while you stay at home and take care of your daughter. Give her space at home while still living there. Spend more time with your daughter. Do anything, but do not move out.
Re: need help!
#773336 06/23/04 05:18 PM
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,277
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avondale25 Offline
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avondale25
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Have you read all the info available on this site? In particular, here is a link regarding infidelity. Steps to survive infidelity

What does your counselor have to say about this? It could be that she has a sense of hopelessness (somewhat typical) OR it could be that she's re-established her affair (or neither).

Deadtitall is right, don't move out. As long as you're in the same house, you can "Plan A" her. As long as you're still at home, there is more hope than there is if you've established separate residences.

Have you given her reasons to see hope for your future together? Have you evaluated your own behaviors, determined what it was that made her have the affair to begin with?

You may want to post this question on the "Just Found Out" or "Plan A/B" forums. Hopefully you aren't quite ready for the "Divorced" forum here, but keep us posted.

Moderated by  Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours 

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