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Joined: May 2004
Posts: 153
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Joined: May 2004
Posts: 153
Hello everyone!

My husband gets served his papers today (though he doesn't know it yet) and I'm starting my first divorce. I guess I really didn't know how much I didn't know about the legal system until this happened.

I was blissfully ignorant to any such laws. I thought marriage was til death do us part but I've found out differently.

The only thing I'm really worried about right now is custody. I have temporary custody of our daughter until the court date in a couple of weeks. What can happen that would put a kabash on me having physical custody of her perminantly?

As I said, I don't know much, only what 225 bux an hour buys me at the lawyer's office. I live in MI if that helps anyone.

I wanna know what the dos and donts are. I am doing everything I can think of, which isn't much. Thanks all.

Joined: Feb 2004
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I wanna know what the dos and donts are. I am doing everything I can think of, which isn't much. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Go here,
http://www.divorcenet.com/mi/mi.html
On the right side of the page, scroll down to "Child Custody Checklist".

Hope this helps.

Joined: Dec 2003
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Chastesin,

First, so sorry you ended up in this situation. My deepest regrets.

As too your question:
Go to the book store and get yourself some books on Divorce.
Your already spending much $$$$$ for a lawyer so a little more isn't going to break you. Even if you already have a good lawyer, you don't want to be led around by your nose. YOU must be in charge of your situation.....as it is your life in the balance.

When contemplating a D, I went out and got "Divorce for Dummies" as well as "The complete Idiots guide to Surviving Divorce" in addition to a couple of others.
In reading, Learned much that I didn't even know I didn't know.

As it appears you know next to nothing about this process, you must go out and get some knowledge to protect yourself and your interests.
Always Remember that knowledge is Power.
Since it appears your H has changed his mind and wants to play hard ball.....your only defense is to be prepared. And learning about ALL aspects of the Divorce proceedings is the only way for you to get prepared.

To survive this your going to need a game plan. YOU can't come up with an effective plan for YOUR Situation if you don't understand the process or the rules.
Please, go out and empower yourself.

I'm not saying go and necessarily get the same books I did.
However, I am saying go and get this information from somewhere, as you truly do NEED IT!
Heck, as I know money is tight for you, start at the public library and see what they have there. Great place to begin your research.

The point is get started. NOT pleasant reading, but OH SO Necessary.

Make NO mistake you do need to get a handle on the ENTIRE process BEFORE you get in too deep here. Save your self a ton of headaches later on by getting your information and as a result your ducks in a row.......before this goes any further.
No one's claiming this will be easy, but you can make it Easier on yourself, by just arming yourself with the what is going to happen at each stage of the game.
YOU have to be prepared ----so start reading and learning TODAY!

A map will get you where you want to be much more quickly then stumbling around lost. Go out and make your map.

Wishing you success in your next challenge.
Take care

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Thanks for your help. I'm going to the bookstore tonight to see what I can find.

I did look at the checklist for child custody and I have disclosed everything to my lawyer.

This is such a hard time right now, physically, emotionally and I just have to remember to stay strong.

Thanks again.

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Chastesin,

Hey there!
How are you?

So what did you find?
Anything helpful?

Let us know, if you get the chance.

till next time

Joined: Feb 2002
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Chastesin,
Thanks for posting to my thread....
Sorry you are having to go through a divorce, but you really sound good, and I do pray that everything works out for you. Just wanted to let you know you are in my prayers.
KK

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ok, I didn't make it to the bookstore, all hell has broken loose over the past few days in all aspects of life.

I did talk to my lawyer again and he told me not to worry about a thing, everything is going to be taken care of, hopefully without even having to go to court, but I still haven't heard from his lawyer on his demands.

I did talk to his girlfriend's husband for the first time today, as he has witnessed first hand the affair and he said he would have no problem going to court to testify or sign a document as a witness. I don't know if that has anything to do with the D or not, I'm just trying to get as much information as possible in what little bit of time I have.

H told me he's fighting for custody, I have temp custody and I am letting her see him during waking hours. Lawyer says I'm doing good, but I wonder what his lawyer is telling him. I hope I'm doing everything right.

I am going to make it a POINT to go to Barnes and Noble booksellers this weekend, as he has had her as much as he can since he talked to his lawyer. Funny how he had no interest in her before, and now he does.

Anyway, I'll keep you posted when I can!

Joined: Jul 2004
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Can someone please tell me what a Custody Checklist is?


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